“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(9:58.) For a while, though he would not admit it, he felt that he would be welcomed with open arms by someone, meaning some system. The spiritualists, he found, would do so, and made overtures. The so-called occult groups would also, with their Gnostic brotherhoods. All he had to do was translate his experience into their terms, as before he felt he was expected to translate it into conventional religious, academic, or scientific terms.

Ruburt suddenly found himself then exploring very strange grounds indeed—and without the earlier sustaining hope. For all the recognized systems were wanting. He did not have to examine each one minutely, for his abilities, after some familiarization, left him with the knowledge of their merits. The stated discernible hypotheses of the various systems are one thing—but their invisible root assumptions are something else. Ruburt tried to put his understanding to practical use in terms of daily life, your relationship, work, finances, his classes, yet he found himself with definite physical hassles. You have encountered them through your relationship with him. In certain areas you both have blazed ahead. Those deeply seated, invisible, cultural assumptions still operated, however. Some of them you both dismissed for the very simple reason that they never temperamentally suited you to begin with. Others you dismissed because you grew in wisdom.

Now only a belief in hostility would justify such behavior. The behavior also says “Look at me. You can’t attack me because I am in such poor shape. It would not be fair play.”

In your system insanity means uncontrolled behavior largely, so he began putting more and more control upon his physical actions, so that no one could say his work was the result of instability. He tried not to appear nervous, but in control, while he was temperamentally and physically fast.

(Pause at 10:40.) Put together beliefs in a hostile world and an untrustworthy self, and you end up in difficulty if you are working with other concepts that tell you that spontaneity is good and that the self is to be trusted. For in the old framework those ideas make no sense. If you do not challenge them then you never come to the point of conflict. You do not even know that you have been taught to fear your own being. It never occurs to you to trust it! You go from expert to expert in whatever field of difficulty arises, and you have far more problems than you two have. Still, things seem to mesh together, for everything is the same color gray.

Here I want to show how invisible cultural beliefs operate individually. You know about them, so it seems you are aware. Yet you do not realize how firmly you accept them. I do not mean just you here (period).

If Ruburt now and then wants to cry on your shoulder, let him, and comfort him. It is natural enough when his body hurts. He would not do it freely, and only because he tries to hide such tears from you does the emotion seem so lonely. He is afraid you are afraid, as you are. But the feeling is never let go properly or healthily, and it is a natural reaction—not threatening at all.