“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(This morning while working on the tax questionnaire for the CPA who handles our affairs, I had cramps in my back and stomach. They came on while I was talking about money with Jane. I’d asked her recently if Seth could say something about my too frequent upsets with my stomach and side, anyhow. The deleted material on my stomach which I’d received on February 2, 1976 had already helped resolve my hassles about using old family photos in “Unknown” Reality.)

The reason for the difficulty with the muscles is so obvious that I am surprised you did not make the connections yourself. It is not the fact of the taxes so much that annoys you, as the uses of the taxes, for you resent “being forced” to contribute your money to what you think of as stupid national policies.

In your mind you creatively envision the ideal—the sanity of some future culture that, hopefully, our work and others will bring about: if not tomorrow, some “time.” On the other hand, you face the evidence of today; almost, though not quite, it seems, the worst picture possible, the antithesis of what is desired. And it seems to you that your money is being used to prolong those conditions.

The money is being achieved or accumulated as a result of your search for the ideal, so it appears twice as ironic to you that the funds for taxes be used to pursue national goals bent, it seems, upon the most gross, shortsightedly practical conditions. This is, if you will forgive the term, beautifully and cleverly connected in your mind with “Unknown” Reality—the book. Here again you find yourself often in a dilemma of your making, between the ideal and what seems to be; if not the grossly practical, something close to it.

More than this, again, any money thus acquired in the future, as in the past, would go to promote the continuance of the very system that, left alone, would mutilate our book, and continue idiotic cultural and political policies that are opposed to what you stand for.

With the book you are in torment as you contemplate the difference between what seems to be the ideal, and its feared actuality. It literally seems more practical and realistic to you that Prentice will somehow ruin the book, than it does to suppose that they will in any way help in bringing about the ideal.

When you let yourself go, your “natural” feelings lead you to fear that they will mutilate photographs, or in some way cheapen the book, dragging it down from the ideal. You have not really gotten it through your head that such thoughts do not represent practical reality, but impractical reality. But the main problem is the dilemma caused by the difference between the ideal and a feared, opposing actuality.

Ruburt’s connections the other evening concerning your mother were correct. (I have a record of these for use in “Unknown” Reality.

Your money will go into ventures you approve of. Underline that sentence. It will be used to support people or ventures that in one way or another seek goals that are in line with our work. When you thoroughly understand what is meant by the entire safe universe concept, then the physical, cultural climate is understood as a medium through which the ideal can be expressed—can be expressed. The ideal is meaningless if it is not physically manifest to one degree or another. The ideal seeks expression. It seeks those channels that it instinctively knows will yield expression. In doing so it often seems to change or alter in ways that are not understood.

This does not mean there are not, for your understanding, “good products and bad products” from your vantage point. It means that the ideal takes many guises, speaks in many forms and voices. What you think of as disclosure is the apparent difference between the ideal and the actuality, as you understand each.

When Ruburt as an individual sought to heal himself, and at the same time sought to divest himself of traditional methods of healing, such as doctors and so forth, he embarked upon a journey through his own beliefs—but also through the beliefs of your own culture. He is coming out on the other side. Again, your discussion about the dentist was vital to him, because he finally understood his attitudes—not only in that area but others; and in those areas, no matter what he told himself, he was afraid that the worst was really happening, or would happen.

He really feared that in actuality he needed gum surgery, and at rock bottom he feared that that was a reality—against which he must fight.