“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

A child might result in your working out full time, in which case you would never, he felt, develop as an artist. Social contacts were kept at a minimum. The isolation he felt you needed would be given you. At the same time his own abilities would be concentrated upon also. It was a do-or-die effort on his part. Once embarked, there was to be no turning back, until finally his own work and your reactions began to hint of difficulties, and his own body reflected them. He tried to keep you from family connections and complications for what he thought was your own good.

The funeral (of my mother on November 19, 1973), family considerations, thoughts of buying a house, brought up difficulties. These were apparent also because at the same time he had begun going out more, giving in some to previously denied impulses, and putting himself in positions that he had not before. He was, in a small period of time, encountering his beliefs in reality as he knows it, therefore.

Now: because of your background you also feel that there is something slightly shameful about going abroad in the day, when a man should be taken up with dutiful work. Your mother was ashamed of your father’s being home, for example. You used to comment to Ruburt about all the people on the streets in working hours. He picked that idea up from you. Your own list of beliefs should be quite illuminating as you continue it. But the real realizations will come as the exercises and their personal comprehension merge with what is written in my book.

This brought forth a turmoil in beliefs, and a creative one that is only now being used and assimilated. His idea of challenging body beliefs is important. Today’s mixture of walking, stimulation and facing the public (while shopping) is highly advantageous, but he should compare his condition not with others but with his reality.

Let Ruburt return to the definite 3-or-4-hour writing period, involving what he understands of Sumari time, interspersed with what you are doing to change the environment in the apartments—a good mixture of the mental and the physical. Now good evening.