“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

Ruburt feels that he has a dragon by the tail. He is damned if he will let go and yet he is afraid to pull harder. You can specifically say that this has to do with what you call your psychic work, but even before “it” began he was aware of that energy of his, concerned about using it, focusing it, delighted with it, and afraid of it at the same time.

(10:22.) Greater recognition might help at a certain level, but this is not the answer. The fact that psychic books, so-called, do not give him what he thinks of as conventional literary praise is annoying but not basically pertinent.

He has been using the symptoms indeed as brakes. These brakes have been applied in what you think of as the psychic arena because that is the chosen situation. It is not physical mobility that worries him, but inner mobility. He is afraid to go ahead, feeling it not safe, yet he is damned if he will retreat, and for that matter he realizes that there is no retreat from your own knowledge and experience.

Whenever Ruburt opens to the dream state, physically he is specifically worried about out-of-body travel. That was a challenge, and his own did not frighten him, but those of others did. His own did bring him up short momentarily, but that he could have handled.

When he allows the experience, his creative abilities will translate it. He has been afraid of letting himself go and utilizing his energies fully, not objectively but subjectively.

It is true that Ruburt’s ideas predominate, that his reality is his, but yours is a part of it, as his is a part of yours. He felt therefore that you did approve of the overall idea, if not particularly the methods. And in the beginning you approved those in your own way.

You did not want Ruburt sick, but you did want brakes applied, and he chose the method. He chose the method for various reasons, from his experience. He had seen you drag your feet, applying brakes to a situation; and identifying with you, and not with his mother, his chose the same means.

He normally and naturally awakens often in the early hours, and does not get up because his body is too sore, in his terms, but he spontaneously feels an alliance with himself and those hours, and intuitively knows that his creative abilities are strong then, and his dream recall good.

The inner challenges, faced, will be nothing. He will realize his safety and ability, but the challenge cannot be put off. Before he sleeps he should remind himself of his natural gift of inner mobility, and encourage dream experience and recall. This alone provides the meeting of inner and outer, and true mobility. You must let him know that you do trust his spontaneity, for it is also your own, as you know.

Let him know also you are there. In a strange manner, not to be given this evening, your own painting mobility is involved. I am not saying that his reality is not his own, that he does not have the joy and responsibility for it, but that you also share a joint reality.