“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

What neither of you realized is the acuteness with which you choose the situations. You have not gone to establishments where dancing is the usual thing, where a dance floor is available. Granted there are other reasons for it, nevertheless you choose to begin with a situation in which dancing is not the norm, where it requires on anyone’s part particular effort, and a spotlighted situation.

Here Ruburt tries to force a situation, to set up on his part an incentive where he will be spotlighted, and therefore knows he will perform well, having chosen a “critical,” dramatic framework.

Now it is this framework that you distrust. He interprets this to mean that you want him to be spontaneous as long as it is acceptable, as long as he blends with others, as long as he does not go too far. He is obviously in not the best physical condition, so the spotlight to you involves the illumination of weakness obviously apparent.

Ruburt feels if you love him you will make the effort, but you retreat. Other things are involved. He has had several drinks before he reaches that point of deciding to dance, or to ask you to. You project upon him the attributes of emotional extravagance that you fear in your mother. That is, what you interpreted as such. Quite simply to you it seemed not the place or the time, precisely because to Ruburt it did seem the place and the time. To him this meant that his emotional mobility could be expressed privately at home under conditions you both found acceptable, but not physically through the body. Yet both of you chose conditions that were not “proper” in those terms to begin with, and hence highlighted the situation so you could understand it. It is more difficult in a way for Ruburt without the highlighted situation, yet easier for you. The spotlight serves as an impetus for him, and as an impediment to some extent for you—so he was trying to use the spotlight as an impetus for action precisely because he doubted his abilities. Now: that is enough for this evening. My heartiest regards to you both, and a fond good evening.