1 result for (book:tps2 AND session:632 AND stemmed:learn)
6/38 (16%)
sell
financial
marketplace
Nebene
eat
[... 2 paragraphs ...]
(10:45 PM.) Now. Ruburt never learned how to handle normal aggressive thoughts.
[... 3 paragraphs ...]
(They had to do with my painting, my lack of financial contributions this year, etc. Jane cried while telling me about them, and while we used the pendulum. They also have to do with her teeth and jaw symptoms, and fear of eating recently, we’ve learned.)
[... 7 paragraphs ...]
(Further, my urge toward doing my best work comes at an age when I feel that I should be doing my best work. When I started painting, I was appalled to discover my ignorance. I’ve spent years trying to learn. The urge to learn, perhaps overdone, may be one of the Nebene characteristics, [and as an aside I thoroughly wish the Nebene character did not exist.] But regardless of that, I didn’t think my wish to excel in my chosen field necessarily a poor one. I was willing to spend the time necessary to master painting. Each one has been a trial. The last year has been very productive as far as learning goes, and I’m at the point where I expect it to begin paying rich dividends. It also seems that this point coincides with a time of trial for Jane and me, as witness these deleted sessions.
[... 1 paragraph ...]
(I do believe that I haven’t made enough of an effort to inform Jane of feelings and goals of mine that I seem to have taken for granted. I can only say that I thought she knew them, or many of them. They aren’t all that mysterious. I hope I live in this reality long enough to get a few years’ mileage out of what I think I have learned.
[... 6 paragraphs ...]
(A thought: I now realize that Jane put the same interpretation on her own work—namely, the psychic work. It took me years to learn that she regarded her work in the psychic field—and the time and energy involved—as aside from her main creative goal, which is to write “straight” literature that is also art.)
[... 12 paragraphs ...]
(Ideas of self-respect, or its lack, have never meant a thing to me... I am free of such burdens. When I left my job I thought it would please Jane, and of course I was glad to see it go, although I would have waited longer on my own. I must admit I don’t understand why each thing we do seems to make matters worse. What is left in our lives to learn, to uncover? What do other people do? I pity them, I guess.)
