“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

Ruburt’s father, to Ruburt, meant laxness, relaxation to the extreme, without drive or fire, responsibility or control. Ruburt’s mother meant will, drive, power, for she had power over the household and over Ruburt. But that power went nowhere, for Ruburt’s father was physically free while his mother was not. Ruburt thought he had to make a choice (louder). If will and power meant relative immobility but purpose—and purpose was what he had—then in the past he chose that above what he thought of as laxness, relaxation, and physical freedom that might mean frittering away ability, a relaxation in which nothing was accomplished.

We come back to will and freedom, discipline and purpose. Ruburt’s background with his mother and his beliefs in will then merged with your feelings for isolation from your father. Ruburt blocked out emotional spontaneity, feeling that his father was lax. You blocked out emotional spontaneity, feeling that your mother’s was detrimental to creative isolation. At the same time you admired Ruburt’s spontaneity. You trusted it however only because it was merged with creative purpose. He therefore used it only for such purpose, not wanting to frighten you with it otherwise because he loved you so.