“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

Your personal worrying, now, is partially the result of old cultural beliefs: you worry about someone you love, and this somehow helps them, and shows them your concern even while it may make you miserable. It also fills you with feelings of being a martyr, and this drains you of your own energy. It is the opposite way, unfortunately ingrained through cultural upbringing—the opposite of the way that should be followed if you want to help a loved one or yourself. For worrying is the prolongation of fearful, negative thoughts directed against another.

Here imagination is negatively applied. Turned around however, with even a quarter of that energy used in the opposite direction, you can have a very helpful secondary support for the person in difficulty. You can tell yourself even that the person might after all take the opposite course than the one that you are imagining, and for a moment reverse the direction of your imagination. Done correctly this will automatically begin to relieve you of the pressures of responsibility felt earlier, and telepathically the other person will pick up feelings of support.

You said earlier yourself that you probably hardly realized how your own viewpoint has altered. You said it passively. That viewpoint should be considered as part of the past. You can no longer use it as an excuse any more than Ruburt can use his symptoms as an excuse any more. You form your reality. If you want to sit back and say “My worry prevents me from enjoyment, creativity and fulfillment,” then do so. It would be better if you said that entire sentence and then put it in the past, and added, “I shall no longer do so.”

Then you will be free to release your own energy for yourself, and to actively and joyfully encourage Ruburt to do the same. There are many things, including this trip, that you both can actively enjoy—but not while you are insisting upon absolute freedom, while at the same time concentrating upon those elements in your experience that seem to keep you from it. Then your main concentration is not upon freedom at all but upon the lack of it, so that the freedoms that are available, even physically to Ruburt in his condition now, become minimized, and both of you suffer.