“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

He feels that he unjustly puts you on the spot, now. Quite rightly, he does not want you to have to double-think before you speak. He repressed the emotions (underlined) in an effort to show improvement.

Had the emotion been honestly faced and brought to the surface it would not have been hidden. The body would not have to express it for him, and it would have cleared the way for other compensating feelings as you encouraged him and pointed out the proper direction for concentration.

Crying is a cleansing and usually quite beneficial activity, releasing psychic as well as physical pressures. He has little use for it, or for people who cry, because of his mother’s crying spells. Crying clears the air and guarantees that the emotion will not be repressed. It is a healthy sign. He shies away from this, fearing that it is negative, or that it will upset you and make him feel worse. Fearing you see the noise, the undisciplined—to him—release.

Explain to him your feelings. It is quite natural for him at times to become discouraged. It is for anyone. When he feels that way it would be of great help if he simply cried alone, or went to you for comfort. He thinks of it as an admission of weakness. There is a connection here sexually with the giving-into emotion, period, in a bodily fashion.

The results will come, but not if he checks constantly for them. This implies the fear that they will not appear, not the faith that they will. The sharing of any emotion with you will quicken the sexual activities, and it is in the area of discouragement in particular that Ruburt represses.

What is involved here is the necessity to recognize and express emotion, period.

In helping Ruburt do so you will also find your own emotional nature released and enriched. Ruburt feels emotions deeply, hence the repression of them causes such difficulties. It is the conscientious self, incidentally, who attaches the idea of good and bad to emotions. I suggest that in a joint pendulum session you address Ruburt’s conscientious self with this in mind.

Ruburt in past years tried to be like you, to emulate what he thought you were like, this fitting in with the overidealization. He would do anything then to avoid an emotional scene. Emotions belonged to parents, who were unreasonable.

He felt emotional displays on his part would make you cast him in the same light as your mother. Her tears put you on the defensive, he felt. He even felt you considered tears contemptible.

It was his emotional nature however and spontaneity that opened your eyes to the necessity for emotional expression. Because he idealized you so, he projected the same kind of feelings from you to him, thinking then that you wanted an ideal mate, not a quite human one. Letting him know that you are not afraid of emotional expression on his part is most important.