“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

Now we will have a relatively brief session, but I would like to give you some important immediate points to work on—not (humorously) that I did not give you enough the other evening.

Telling him that you are suddenly mad enough or angry enough to insist upon changes is obviously not the approach. He thought you were angry enough to begin with. Physical improvement, now, in that context (underlined), meant something else you were demanding, but did not expect.

When you showed impatience with his progress it was sometimes a natural impatience, and sometimes Nebene’s dissatisfaction with a student who should, with those abilities, do better. Ruburt would indeed perceive withering looks on such occasions. Neither of you properly understood your own reactions. But Ruburt would immediately panic.

The difficulty showed itself in Ruburt in keeping with the style of life that you were both accustomed to. You did not go out without a reason. The idea was to avoid chores, time taken from work, ordinary mixing with neighbors. You never felt a responsibility to go out, but a responsibility to stay home and work.

Both of you had to acquiesce to some extent in the situation. He did not choose for example a way of action, even physically, that would go against your style of life or ideas, but cleverly wove these into ideas you both initially deeply believed in. when you were working particularly at Artistic, you could not say he was out gadding around and not using his abilities. There he was in his chair. He could not leave it.

I am mentioning these. Some are details. They are important. If you or Nebene ever thought that objective details were important then see how important Ruburt thinks subjective ones area. You lit cigarettes for him, particularly when you were in public, but you did not open the car door unless he asked you, or reminded you when that hurt or humiliated him.

The whole thing boils down to the fact that he thought and felt you would not help him, but demand that he use his own abilities and help himself independently of you. You held his arm once as he crossed a busy street, in, I believe, Cobbleskill, and he never forgot it. At other times you would say “Be careful,” impatiently, “Watch where you are going. Don’t you see that car,” when he simply could not turn that quickly, and was terrified. There were other occasions when you held his arm and helped him and he remembers each one.

He is afraid to, but if you saw the worst, as he thinks of it, and accepted him as he is, then help him, he can be pleased to show you any improvement. The improvement will follow if my suggestions are followed, and if both of you understand the reasons as given.

Your explanation of a Nebene reaction would be so reasonable, later. You could not understand his insistence that you gave him a withering (underlined) look, but he felt it with the vehemence behind it. Against that he became vehement himself, stubborn, and determined to fight in you a quality that on the other hand he did not honestly think you possessed.

I am not telling you that dedication to work is not good, as you know, but it cannot take the place of all other human interest and communication.