“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(We were due to leave here tomorrow morning; we were all packed, etc. Our landlord, Rich Elgersma, visited us this evening and told Jane and me about a trailer and lot that he could have acquired not long ago for $1300.00. The news made us regretful in some way; it seemed to suggest answers to some of our own problems re living costs, locations, etc. Both of us liked it here. The weather has been very charming indeed.

(Today in our talks Jane and I said a lot of things about our goals, purposes, distractions. Jane talked to several people here today who reminded her that there was always a need to be filled regardless of location, about such things as reincarnation, dreams, etc; this also made us feel that we could work out here, in living arrangements and income, as well as anywhere else. In addition, my pendulum told me today that my hand symptoms stemmed from my fear of failure as a fine artist—nothing else.

Unconsciously you feel that because you are the oldest son you should be the money-maker, in your mother’s eyes; but she never considered painting as such as financially rewarding. You still do not want to hurt her feelings. You are still trying to be yourself and the self you think she wants you to be, as far as you are able. Certain concessions for example you would never make, but you are still unconsciously bothered here, whether you know it or not.

You are not financially in any desperate need. By many standards even Ruburt’s health would be considered excellent. A concentration upon the healthy parts of his body will help increase his health. That is the point I am trying to make here. Be thankful for what you do have, and it will be increased.

Ruburt experienced a jerky irritation of muscles and a jangling of nerves. The repressed nature however came through, which is a definite advance. The sexual area is charged for him for those reasons. Here most of all he is afraid of letting go, and yet the pressure of course builds.