“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

Unconsciously you feel that because you are the oldest son you should be the money-maker, in your mother’s eyes; but she never considered painting as such as financially rewarding. You still do not want to hurt her feelings. You are still trying to be yourself and the self you think she wants you to be, as far as you are able. Certain concessions for example you would never make, but you are still unconsciously bothered here, whether you know it or not.

Now. Several portions of the personality have already helped in the release of repressed feelings; the conscientious self particularly, which was the greatest repressor. In any cases of great repressive nature, one part of the personality may act alone in the beginning but later it must get the cooperation of other portions.

Any release therefore involves all of these cooperating parts. They follow the leader, so to speak, each part repressing various areas. In what has happened in the last few days, the conscientious self gave its consent to the release of various groups of thought and feeling it previously kept hidden.

Other portions followed, beginning to release those feelings generally under their sway. The sexual implications last evening, generally under several various areas of personality, could not have come into consciousness, for example, without the consent of the conscientious self, which says often “No work, no sex.” And often says “No sex anyway. It must go into ‘good’ creative work.”