“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

It became—relatively now—a displaced discontent. You felt that there was nothing you could do about the situation, that there was no reason to worry about it, but the anxiety was displaced then, draining your energies.

—built up by unsolved problems. A concentration upon your individual and combined work, your practical plans in that direction, will promote an enthusiasm that you have not felt jointly or individually in years. You will know that you are on the right track.

The symptoms therefore will be released as that energy or concentration is placed back where it belongs, into creative and practical action. You felt as if you could not move also, and before Ruburt’s symptoms began. You felt this psychologically; do you follow me?

Your discussion this evening was beneficial and showed a point in progress on both of your parts. Earlier Ruburt would have become alarmed and frightened, felt you were being negative, and discouraged at any verbal and emotional encounter with the feelings that you expressed, precisely because they brought into the open feelings of his. This time however he recognized that earlier he would have brooded and gone to bed, leaving you to brood alone at his ways.

Your own attitude was partially set by your father’s innate and quite strong sense of independence. He hated to work for anyone else. The same applies to Ruburt’s background, mainly with his grandfather. You would have felt freer had you tried to freelance; for freelancing, while it would have produced long range its own problems would have allowed you a greater sense of freedom.

Now. I will tell you something else. You felt that you owed it to your mother to try a secure type of financial arrangement, as far as you were personally able to do so. You realized that a full-time job was out of the question. Remember at least that you did not fall into that trap, and that you both had enough sense to avoid it.

To you a part-time job helped compensate. You feared losing status in your family’s eyes by casting yourself completely aside into areas alien to them. You also felt that this would equate you in your mother’s eyes with your father. She, your mother, went with the main stream. Your father did not. You did not want to hurt her feelings particularly in the beginning. Your mother did think of Ruburt as a threat, for she recognized at once that Ruburt would not encourage the tendencies that she herself respected.