“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

I told you some of this was review, but pertinent. He felt that when he had initiated action in the past that it had not worked, and he was then afraid of initiating new action, so he kept waiting for you to do so. This mainly involved the idea of leaving your job, particularly as money accumulated in the bank.

Now besides all this, as you know, because of his background he has a great need for emotional give-and-take and reassurance. This must come largely from you. It is and has been a sore point. As he became afraid that youth left him and that your drives to paint and write were not as secure and overriding, then he became even more in need of reassurance.

Because of the situation, of course, it was even more difficult than usual for you to give it. This in itself aggravated those old fears concerning sex and the body—that it would lead him astray. If you did not—I am using his terms now—flirt with him and play with him in those terms, he was afraid he would look for that assurance in other men’s eyes.

All of this contributed to the hampering of body motion. For whatever reasons, he never planned to marry a man who would go away to work each day, but saw you both involved in a jointly-shared comradeship of work and love. You, it seemed later, grabbed hold of a job with great tenacity and would not let it go, and he grew more and more afraid of suggesting that you do so.

Since you did not do so on your own, he was afraid that this meant that you did not want to. He would be forcing you into a position that you were avoiding with all your might, regardless of what you said. He felt forced into a corner, with life slipping away.

Now. With each book that Ruburt produced, he felt guiltier that you were still at the job. He was afraid that both of you would become too timid as time went on to make the move that he felt you must make, and that the necessary opportunity would slip through you fingers.