“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

You have to let yourself go and paint. In your early life you learned the discipline of form, most necessary. The knowledge of form is one that many never assimilate. You were giving yourself a thorough foundation. The framework, learning the form first, was adopted for several reasons, having to do with other existences, to some extent given.

In doodles, in oils, in whatever suits you, and whatever suits you over a period of time, will find its own pattern. Do not harness yourself with the idea that you had (underlined) “so much” (in quotes) ability, and that you have not used it. That is not the case. You have instead an open channel. You chose to spend a good amount of time dealing with form.

You wanted to express ideas in paintings that do not come in youth, and to merge a particular kind of understanding with a particular kind of form. You had an existence in which your art matured early, as Josef in Ruburt’s Seven. You dealt with emotion unrestrained by discipline, and with the feelings of a young man. Josef was not able to paint anything worthwhile past the age of 40, and he turned to a land-owner’s province.

Now. Regardless of what you think, pure inspiration has nothing to do with time. Each artist has other overall concepts to work with besides those regarding his art.

Van Gogh, for your information, was (underlined) obsessed personally with ideas of self-mutilation, and underwent great inner torture. He chose those feelings however so that he could view the world and reality in a certain light. That light enabled him to do what he wanted to but could not fake: paint the world through that particular unique vision.

His “success” (in quotes) was no success to him. The illumination that makes great paintings, again, has nothing to do with time. A man may work for nearly a century and not attain it, or it may come tomorrow afternoon.

You also wanted your work to show and express those mysterious moments when the rivers begin to flow (underlined), the heart learns to speak. The rain begins to form. You wanted to express in painting then the freeing of emotions—that could not be expressed unless first there had been repression, and those energies in full blossom that have nothing to do with age.

You place too great a burden upon yourself when you consider your ability something that must (underlined) be used. It flows through you naturally. Many spontaneous ideas for paintings and sketches you automatically reject because of several reasons. They do not fit in with your ideas of work (underlined), or with your idea of what you think you ought (underlined) to do, or because you are being too ponderous, and hence shove away many spontaneously playful ideas.

Do not think so in terms of stages of paintings and their execution. See the complete painting as you want it, and have the faith that it will look that way. Instead you are overly concerned with the stages it will go through, or must, and this is inhibiting.

Let the image in your mind flow imaginatively onto the board. You often think so in terms of the problems to be worked out that you concentrate upon those, in your terms. Do one of two things if there are distractions. Admit them and quite freely allow them to go into the painting freely, or firmly tell yourself that you will not allow them to divert you. But take one stand or the other.

Your form is ready. The ideas I have given you will bring that form to free life, however, if you use them. Your emotional life has already been enriched of late with the interactions with Ruburt. You are both doing well in following what I told you. Continue to do so.

Your own giving is flowing into your work. Let your work have its way. Do not insist it be such and such. Allow it its flow; and now I bid you a fond good evening.

And then we will return next time to dictation. But you are both doing well.