“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

Now—is it all right for me to come in now?

Now your remark, not verbatim, “Come on, Hon, get with it,” worked to some extent, for it roused his desire to give you a good day, not to spoil it, and his spirits rose to some degree. But you did not encourage him to express the feelings. Both of you dealt with the matter in the old way, to some extent.

Now. What Ruburt said about the beloved monster (Willy, our cat) is true.

(This afternoon Jane had some very good insights as to why we had taken in the kitten, Parmesan – who, incidentally, is now gone to the parents of friends, etc.)

Now your relationship, as I told you, is a creative springboard for you both. The Sumari development would not have occurred until your relationship had a revival, and further creative developments have already been sparked for the same reason.

Now. I fear I am needed. I told you that in the past a week might have gone on with yesterday’s conditions, plus the fact that I would not have been permitted to give you information, or feedback—and certainly a day such as today would not have followed.

Now a small note: Your poor, misguided, unjolly bachelor friend downstairs did you a service many times, in complementing your wife when you were unable to do so, in giving her a sense or a glimmer of female pride or appreciation when you were unable to communicate, and you knew this.

You were partially grateful for it, and partially angry, but at yourself. Now that Ruburt is coming to you more fully again, and your neighbor’s compliments and flirtations are no longer needed, you are ready to jump on him, both of you.

Ruburt was glad many times that a man found her attractive when she did not see that answering glimmer in your eye—not that it was entirely your fault, now.

I wanted to give you insight on that, however. Now take a break. Today can be considered a touchstone. Both of you did things right.

(10:52. Ordinarily we have been getting some personal material, to be followed by theoretical data for the balance of the session. I now said I’d rather learn something about why Jane wasn’t putting on weight, rather than get something on Sumari, for instance. 11:05.)

Now. We will continue then along present lines.

The beloved monster lost weight, looked neglected, lost his luster, became listless unless forced into activity, looked older. Now, he was suddenly deprived of his position. The emotional energy usually given him automatically was transferred elsewhere. You saw the sudden change. He also became in his own way obstinate.

Now Ruburt’s weight is a part of the whole picture. Added to this are certain attitudes of your own, that is attitudes both of you have. Both of you have the same attitude, which means that they are magnified, doing double duty.

These are emotional. You may make intellectual adjustments yourself, but Ruburt has not made them. The emotional attitudes are: weight is bad. Whenever you speak of weight yourself it is with that connotation. People are overweight. The good word does not have the word weight in it. It is slim. It is the word weight, now, that is loaded—forgive my pun.

There is little fun connected with it. Now you do vary in your attitudes, but only in degree. You will be more adventurous or inventive perhaps at this time, but the strict emotional attitude remains the same. The kitchen is the least important part of your house. These attitudes, then, do not help. To some extent Ruburt is in a quandary, for the idea of gaining weight seems to contradict other deeply-buried feelings.

Ruburt considers it in very poor taste (humorously) to ‘oh’ and ‘ah’ over food. Both of you enjoy a sense of moral superiority in the presence of your brothers’ families, that they eat so heartily while you refrain. Both of you now prove that you are not sunken in materialism by being thin. Ruburt simply carries this further than you do, rigidly holding his ground despite all entreaties to the contrary.

He did not, in the past now, feel nourished. When your intimate situation improves, so will his eating habits. But oddly enough the reverse also applies—when his eating habits improve so will your intimate lives. Your tempting him to eat, for example, and underline tempting, has strong sexual connotations to which he will respond, both sexually and through eating more.

Both of you also have emotional ideas, now being tempered I hope, emotional feelings, that to deny sex or minimize it is to improve your creative capacity. Instead you squeeze yourselves dry.

Philosophically and practically there are many ramifications on this subject that I hope to cover, but what I have said for now applies. The word tempt is important, for it implies on you part a willingness to have him taste and share with you both through food and sexual enjoyment. Telling him to eat without understanding your own emotional attitude is useless, for he picks up and exaggerates the Puritan-like feelings toward food. Your preparing food for him now and then as a counterpoint can help.

(“I usually cook breakfast now.”)