“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

Now—

Now there were unfortunate aspects to which you both did react, but in the beginning there were compensating factors in the beauty of the environment, the whole view. I did encourage you to move at one time.

Now. It is the putting off of satisfactions that you want, always into the future. If you really do not care about the satisfactions they do not matter. If you constantly want them without making any conscious effort, then that involves a constant sense of stress.

In the past many of you here were of the same age group. Now with younger people about the thoughts are stronger that this is a place of transition. The fact that you have not moved does reflect a lack of initiative on both of your parts.

The question, however brings up all of your attitudes—and you also have social attitudes—another apartment is no answer in that context. The thought of buying a house brings up strong feelings of inadequacy on your part. You feel that you should have been able to provide one for Ruburt by now.

Now you may take your break.

Now you are both creatures of habit, wanting feelings of security in which to work. Otherwise you would have moved a long time ago. Because you have no family you do respond with and to your environment strongly, and that response colors your health and your work.

Now. Many of these characteristics are not particularly negative at all. For example, Ruburt never felt comfortable in the yard when [the] Spazianis and the neighborhood ladies gathered. Neither did you. The bushes at the side however, and the garden area, largely compensated, and the secret quality the corner had.

Now all of these issues made him more and more susceptible to certain influences that were in the house. The influences were not dangerous unless you were in the mental mood to be affected by them.

There were a series of seemingly innocuous desires, but forever put off, it seemed. Now with people who have many other sources of amusement, occupation, family gatherings and social episodes, such things do not have such meaning. Most of your contacts are professional; you both work at home. The environment therefore becomes highly important, as the living medium in which you work. This is one reason why you were not as affected as Ruburt, because you were away from the environment part of the day. Do you follow me?

Now that you are here the relevance is important, but you do not have the built-up accumulation. At one time Ruburt could walk in the yard, you see, in privacy. He felt shielded. Now you do not understand how both of your attitudes were affected, as the house itself changed and as it changed hands.

You have private rooms now in a public area that becomes more public all the time, as tenants, strangers, move in and out. For a while the whole house had feelings of privacy when the same tenants, for example Lucy, were here for some time. With a change in tenants the halls for example become anonymous, all of these feelings strongly operate, and on both of your parts. Ruburt reacts physically, he waits physically. You do not feel safe to work.

Now in this structure everything else is aggravated—the feelings between you and Ruburt mentioned so often for example. You both feel hampered in love-making. He does not feel he can let go. To raise your voice, to express aggression when you feel it, becomes a cautious endeavor. In the past you felt surrounded at least by relative good will... changing tenants alters those feelings, however. You both resented it.

Now. The symptoms began to show when it seemed to Ruburt changes should be made.

Now. Neither of you were ready to make such a physical change. Financially he could have, as you can now, but you were not willing to face the issues beneath. You would have moved out of resentment, feeling forced to, and not out of understanding.

Now money for security he does want, but this he sees after the necessities are taken care of: a suitable environment. If he is not happy today, money in the bank is meaningless to him. He also felt that a house might interfere with your ideas of work—the added responsibility, and he kept that in mind.

There has been deep resentment here, and on both of your parts, having to do with decision making, and misunderstandings. Now you may take a break or end the session as you prefer.

Now. Through the years Ruburt has always been the one to watch the ads, at least in spurts, and watched your reaction.