“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(We could only think that something, somewhere, somehow, had escaped our daily notice; yet to pin this down seemed beyond our means. We felt exhausted. I finally went back to the studio to relax a bit. Unknown to me Jane used her pendulum in her workroom. When we sat for the session around 9 PM, Jane said her pendulum told her that the symptoms were caused by the house we lived in, and, specifically, by the original owner. This individual, nameless to us, had built the elaborate shower in apartment five, which is one of the two apartments we have here.

He is in a state of frozen waiting, and all of the elements given in the past have applied. The environment has gone down; the garden apartment here that he once thought of no longer exists. He thought of this place as highly desirable once in social terms—the best place you had ever lived in together. As the neighborhood deteriorated he became more and more irate, as did you.

To some considerable degree you have not been willing to count on yourself. You have negatively assumed that you could find nothing suitable—no place, that is—and resented the time involved. The change, the added space, for a while did help, you see. Ruburt does feel closed in; to some extent you also do —not free for example in the summer to take advantage of the yard—one minute example. But you live with some constant aggravation.

The last episode, around the corner (on Grove Street, in a flooded area) did not apply, it was a token gesture. Each of you knew you would not live close to the river. Ruburt is also afraid of changing the status quo, however, as you are. So both of you have resented the other for not making a definite decision to move.

In your present dwelling there are many obvious issues. The two tiny kitchens show clearly that the nourishment of food has been given the last spot, in both of your lives. Ruburt simply carried it to the extreme, but the inclination is obvious in your dwelling.

Ruburt is hardly able to do housework. He does not want to do it. It is his resentment against this apartment (5). This room (the living room) is the only one he regularly enters.

There were a series of seemingly innocuous desires, but forever put off, it seemed. Now with people who have many other sources of amusement, occupation, family gatherings and social episodes, such things do not have such meaning. Most of your contacts are professional; you both work at home. The environment therefore becomes highly important, as the living medium in which you work. This is one reason why you were not as affected as Ruburt, because you were away from the environment part of the day. Do you follow me?

The Seth Material hardcover did not financially change the situation that much, but his classes began to bring in money. The dream book’s failure was also important financially. The money itself meant little difference to him. Where he lives with you is highly important, and if you remember always has been.

It seemed to him that you were always going to leave your job one day and paint, but that day never came and the two of you were going to move one day, but that day never came, so he forced the one issue. In Florida he thought seriously of living there to make a move, but nothing came of it. Your discussion this evening at the table about finances led him deeper into those feelings he tries so hard to avoid. Here he was doing better than ever, with more money in the offing, and to what purpose? Nothing would ever change. He could not keep up financially, much less think of moving, so put it ahead in the future again.