“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

You chose ahead of time therefore to be driven along certain directions. Now. Both of you decided that you would give your lives to creative work. Both of you decided that you would have no children, not only because this fit in with the first goal, but because the energy connected with family life would go into your creative productions, would be saved and available when you began to embark upon the psychic work for which you had also planned.

These simple things you know but often overlook. They are forged together. There is a built-in area of adjustment. When you approach either end of this area, automatic danger signals go off, telling you to move in one direction or the other, back to the symbolic center of your energy and abilities.

Symbolically you also compared that spontaneous flow with semen, creative abilities, and were jealous of it getting away from you. Ruburt was aware of this on one level. He also felt that this was the main reason why you had nothing to do with class, refused even once to attend it. You felt it was depriving you, not only of, say, a private session if Ruburt did not hold the following regular one; you also felt that the sexual activity you were not getting from Ruburt was being channeled instead psychically where you were getting no benefit. To use this energy in private sessions was all right because it was a joint performance, a private one, and you both directly benefited.

The spontaneity of action as a result however was extremely difficult. The energy has been blocked. You saw it briefly in his fit of anger. Because of your past-life connections—and I will see to it that you get this material—he chose to put all his eggs in one basket, so to speak, as you did. But he also chose to divest himself of any distracting family references in later life, as far as his own parents were concerned.