“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

One of the reasons why he did not understand that the spontaneous intuitive self was the deeply creative and therefore deeply stable self, was that he identified it with his idea of femininity as he unfortunately misunderstood it. It was therefore second best, undependable, and could lead to byways that were not respectable. He never equated money with respectability or prestige. As a youngster he had no family background or money, and his need to be looked up to and held in esteem could not wait.

He feels also that this image suits your ideas, as indeed it does to a large degree. This also has something to do with your private lives, for the feminine portions of that nature can quite easily be frightened into not showing themselves through the monthly function—that is so utterly spontaneous, so mysterious to the intellect, and the one main sign by which the female monthly shows her difference from the male.

Now to some extent when that began, you acquiesced. For while you were adventurous, you also to some extent feared the spontaneous nature that was so a part of your wife, in those terms. A small somewhat amusing note: whenever, throughout your marriage, you commented adversely when Ruburt was about to throw a scarf about his neck, or perhaps wear an extra chain with others, he interpreted this, and quite correctly, as a hint of caution on your part that he was giving too much prevalence to the feminine love of ornamentation.

The male characteristics he always thought of as stabilizing. The intellect and the tailored clothes went together. The quick motions were always associated with inner intuitive feminine abilities. The symptoms have in part been meant to reassure you that you need not be afraid that he would be driven by his impulses. In the beginning of the psychic work you were concerned at spontaneous sessions, and while you were highly intrigued by the developments. There was one situation in particular that frightened you both—the time that Ruburt ended up on the floor when he picked up the information from your neighbor, Barbara.

You gave him quite a lecture, but it was nothing like the lecture he gave himself, and it rearoused old fears of giving in spontaneously to impressions or psychic data. He considered this dangerous. He began to watch out that such episodes would nor reoccur, and this was reflected in muscular tenseness.