“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

He has as you know excellent intuitive abilities. In the past in his poetry the intuitive abilities were somewhat isolated. The truths that came through could be considered as creative fantasies and therefore did not have to be accepted literally, or accepted by the intellect.

The intuitive portions of himself he has always considered as feminine. The intellectual capacities he always considered masculine. He relied upon the intellectual abilities therefore as the stronger, because in his own background he believed the male to have the greater strength.

Some of this has to do with the cultural climate that colored his attitudes. He puts his intuitions in as intellectual terms as possible. To his way of thinking this gives them greater acceptability, strength and durability. He will not be laughed at as a result.

One of the reasons why he did not understand that the spontaneous intuitive self was the deeply creative and therefore deeply stable self, was that he identified it with his idea of femininity as he unfortunately misunderstood it. It was therefore second best, undependable, and could lead to byways that were not respectable. He never equated money with respectability or prestige. As a youngster he had no family background or money, and his need to be looked up to and held in esteem could not wait.

He set himself up then as an intellectual, and this became his badge of respectability. It also held a more masculine than feminine image in his mind however, for the reasons as given.

He could not deny the intuitive self, so it became the self who wrote poetry. In his environment this however was an intellectual thing to do. The feminine image meant instability, intuitions that could lead into unrespectable by-ways, and emotions that were not intellectually restrained.

You, being a male, he felt, would be most alarmed at any undue emotionalisms. This aside from your own reaction to your mother’s emotionalism. So there was a good division set up between his intellectual-respectable-to-him masculine aspects, and his intuitive, feminine, private aspects.

In appearing on television he wore initially the pants suit to stress the masculine aspects, or tailored clothes, each stressing to him the more masculine, intellectual, respectable qualities of his nature. He is saying, you see, “I am quite normal, quite intellectual, and in my way quite responsible and proper. Do not be alarmed by my wild mystical self, for it is well under control.”

Now to some extent when that began, you acquiesced. For while you were adventurous, you also to some extent feared the spontaneous nature that was so a part of your wife, in those terms. A small somewhat amusing note: whenever, throughout your marriage, you commented adversely when Ruburt was about to throw a scarf about his neck, or perhaps wear an extra chain with others, he interpreted this, and quite correctly, as a hint of caution on your part that he was giving too much prevalence to the feminine love of ornamentation.

Now. In his restrained motion he has to some extent (underlined) adopted what he feels to be the more proper, deliberate responsible characteristics connected in his mind with the symbolically masculine, analytical intellectual.

The male characteristics he always thought of as stabilizing. The intellect and the tailored clothes went together. The quick motions were always associated with inner intuitive feminine abilities. The symptoms have in part been meant to reassure you that you need not be afraid that he would be driven by his impulses. In the beginning of the psychic work you were concerned at spontaneous sessions, and while you were highly intrigued by the developments. There was one situation in particular that frightened you both—the time that Ruburt ended up on the floor when he picked up the information from your neighbor, Barbara.

The tests with Instream, and your own, precipitated a situation in which his intellect was constantly checking his intuitive information. Because of his own background this precipitated a situation in which one portion of the self was constantly scrutinizing another portion with a jaundiced eye.

To some extent illness has been used by you both in a constructive manner. On your part (RFB) initially as a very definite warning that you were not to put your full energies into a job. Pressure from your parents could have precipitated such an arrangement. Your illness was then used by Ruburt to bring to the surface of his mind deeply-rooted fears that had been festering beneath. Your illness served this purpose for you also. This further led to a recognition of the basic uselessness of many of the ideas upon which your existences had been based, and upon which your society was based. This triggered the need to find newer answers and to probe into other dimensions.

You could see Ruburt’s errors in this respect to some extent, but you could not see your own. Your feelings then helped feed Ruburt’s own misconceptions. You also felt safe when he did not move so fast, when his slower mobility seemed to denote greater deliberation, when in other words he did not let himself go.

Your allowing the longer hair is a sign that of late you have become less frightened of the symbolically creative and feminine aspects of the artist. Your refusal in the past to look the part of an artist, per se, reflected your determination to insist upon, to you, the contrasting masculine aspects. As you allowed yourself somewhat more freedom in this regard, you both saw to it that in compensation Ruburt in his appearance allowed himself less.

In withholding his periods he also felt he lessened the pressure upon you, for he gave up the biological badge of femininity, and was saying “You will never have to have a full-time job to support a child.” He knew full well that you didn’t feel you would ever make a living as a fine artist.

The monthly periods unconsciously served as a constant threat by reminding you each of his femininity and ability to bear a child.