“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

The intuitive portions of himself he has always considered as feminine. The intellectual capacities he always considered masculine. He relied upon the intellectual abilities therefore as the stronger, because in his own background he believed the male to have the greater strength.

One of the reasons why he did not understand that the spontaneous intuitive self was the deeply creative and therefore deeply stable self, was that he identified it with his idea of femininity as he unfortunately misunderstood it. It was therefore second best, undependable, and could lead to byways that were not respectable. He never equated money with respectability or prestige. As a youngster he had no family background or money, and his need to be looked up to and held in esteem could not wait.

The tests with Instream, and your own, precipitated a situation in which his intellect was constantly checking his intuitive information. Because of his own background this precipitated a situation in which one portion of the self was constantly scrutinizing another portion with a jaundiced eye.

Now. Without the psychic development, your combined background could have quite undermined your creative abilities entirely. This was a chance you took, both of you, when you set up this last reincarnational existence.

Now all of this is highly important. To some extent it was inevitable, considering your backgrounds. The feminine aspects in any case, culturally speaking, were being denied since you did not want children. Reincarnationally this you set ahead of time. If the psychic developments that represented your greatest fulfillment, with all their ramifications in your art and life, had not occurred, then you would have had two children, and continued a reincarnational cycle. There are other aspects here, in that in your last reincarnational life you had somewhat greater freedom within the sexual framework. You can come closer to the ideal identity that gives greater rein within one individual to both male and female characteristics.

So all in all, with the problems, you have managed well. This fits in with your own artistic nature, and with your background in this life. You also identified your creativity with female characteristics or abilities, symbolically speaking, and this has something to do with your distrust of making money with your art.

In your mind making money is a male characteristic, and subconsciously a male prerogative. The fact that you painted and it did not seem to bring you money served further to make you distrust these creative abilities. You identified them to some extent with your mother, the first female of course in your background. She was unpredictable, and so you felt you could not depend upon your art, nor count upon it as a man. (Much louder.)