“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

When you can into longer accept it then you must change it. Otherwise the feeling of hopelessness builds up. Ruburt has been afraid, because of his background, to accept the negative aspects of your exterior circumstances. He loves you so deeply that he never wants to admit that you are hurt, bitter or sad. He has always thought that you were used, mainly by your mother, but he was afraid that his statements would be misinterpreted because of his own relationship with his parents.

However Ruburt has also picked up your feeling of hopelessness. Both of you have refused to come to grips with it and have been afraid of making any physical moves, or upsetting the apple cart. Ruburt is only too aware of the fact that he pushed to leave Sayre, and that your circumstances afterward in Florida were negative. He felt you blamed him for this, and thought it was an undisciplined action on his part, forcing you to make changes you did not want to make.

All of the material given concerning Ruburt’s background and motives is highly legitimate, but it shows clearly why he was willing to take on this role. He thought it would free you. In late months he has seen that it has not.

He would do literally anything to see you relieved and happy, and working productively. He thought, or felt, that by taking on the symptoms of your joint problem, he could free you creatively, and was bewildered when it did not.

You were willing to let this continue, feeling that it was temporary, and that you had done it for him before. You have a deep distrust of moving, because of your parents’ stationary background, and because of your father’s distrust and fear of the outside world.

Ruburt was terrified because his early efforts seemed to have left you nowhere. You seemed to have no initiative to make a physical move on your own, and he was afraid of making another false suggestion. You simply became afraid to act in the physical universe. For a while you adopted the symptoms of immobility then Ruburt accepted them.

(10:43. Seth returned almost at once, after I said that I wasn’t interested in solving our problems by simply changing jobs for more money – the problem was that I wanted time to paint, etc., and time for Jane to write.)

Now. One note. You both felt that since you were the one who had the part-time job, Ruburt would accept the physical symptoms of your predicament, and you felt this was just.

You did because you felt that you were facing physical reality to that extent, and he was not. And he did for the same reason.

(11:07. This was the end of the session, although Jane started out to merely take a break.)