“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

Ruburt was strongly committed to the sessions on the one hand, and highly skeptical on the other. Your own illness did literally terrify him, and he feared that if he faced his true doubts concerning my existence, that he would hurt you.

He used them indiscriminately. (Pause.) Wait now... He let them run away with him, and is doubly afraid now. He used little common sense, and was overly emotional, reading signs where there were none, and ignoring the fine intellect that he had even then.

It is Ruburt’s nature you see to accept heartily or to disagree heartily, to plunge headlong into, or to run from, and the psychic developments made it impossible for him to do either; or rather his reactions made wholehearted acceptance or rejection impossible. This put him in a nether land, to him highly unacceptable.

Periods of belief would be followed by periods of skepticism, and the wavering nature makes it most difficult for me to give him the very assurance that he needs. This was one of the reasons for the table developments, and these will be followed by others.

He is highly skeptical of AA, when he tries to consider him as an individual person, but is perfectly content to think of him as a force. (Pause.) It is not his early complete acceptance of the Catholic Church that is a block here. It is his disillusionment with the church that followed. For this led him to skepticism. And to a distrust of spiritual matters.