“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

Now. I am going to give you some comments on the situation you have been discussing, and I am going to do some more work on my book. Now which would you prefer first?

Now there are several, and they are being bypassed and to some extent unrecognized because of this other emphasis. Some of this also applies to you. For example, Ruburt is doing very well in his classes, enjoys it, and closes his eyes, relatively speaking, to the improvement he has worked in the lives of his students, and to the freedoms he has allowed himself in class in using his abilities. The class before last is a case in point. Both of you do not realize the exceptional impact you have on others in personal relationships.

Tell him that good health is as accessible to him as air. He does not have to work for it. It is indeed his right, and natural heritage. It is a means toward using his abilities, not a reward for using them. It is not something given to him when he is good, and withdrawn when he feels he has been bad.

Now, in your good intentions you told Ruburt lately that he was using only a tenth of his abilities, meaning that most people only used a portion of their capabilities. (I also explained this meaning to Jane at the time.) He took this as an accusation, however, and further concentrated upon his lacks. Neither of you should expect perfect performance in your work, and I say this to you as well as to Ruburt. To some extent there has been a weaving in and out, so that at times Ruburt’s symptoms were personal, and at times they were symbols for both of your attitudes.

His symptoms would become then at times symbols of your joint lack of perfection, mainly in your works. His symptoms became a hanger upon which you could hang your joint dissatisfactions, his physical condition an easy mark to stand for what both of you considered inner imperfections; again, connected mainly with your creative endeavors.

It was like having a handy whipping-dog around. Now if the whipping-dogs were not connected with Ruburt, this would be a handy family mechanism. Another point I would mention: Ruburt knows quite well your own progress in your own work. He has always been psychologically and psychically attuned to your work. He knows for example when you are doing well and when you feel you are in difficulties, even if it seems to you he does not look at a particular painting, or take, notice.

He knows how long you work at a painting before you are satisfied, and he felt that you might be hurt by my book, seemingly so effortlessly written. So he had to make it more difficult. Do you follow me?

You work mornings outside. He feels guilty that you do. He feels how you would enjoy and appreciate painting in the same way that my book is being presented, so spontaneously and quickly, comparatively speaking. He thinks this should be granted to you rather than to him, to make up for your job, and so he has felt somewhat guilty about it, and punished himself by holding off. He was afraid you would be jealous of the book, and hurt, and his panic was of your reaction.

(Already I am at work on Jane to disabuse her of any ideas like these. I could only be hurt by her feeling this way any longer.)

Another point. To some extent he has always felt guilty at the work involved in your writing up the sessions, and when my book began he felt this twice as badly, you see.

(Seth’s delivery was very friendly here. I’ve told Jane before that typing up this material has always been a job I do gladly, since I believe in it and regard it as having a vital part of a work that is both highly creative and original. It also gives me an opportunity to do some writing on my own in conjunction with Seth’s own data and this I enjoy greatly.

For one thing, she is afraid that the Jesuit will get more severe symptoms of his own, as a result of work pressure, and in a protective way she is trying to say “Bill, do not get sick. See, I will get sick myself instead, for you.”

She also feels guilty at being in good health when he is so unhappy in his work, and has adopted symptoms out of sympathy.

Beyond this the symptoms are a protest. She thinks that he could get out of some (underlined) obligations connected with work, if he really exerted himself to do so, and was not afraid of doing so.

She is saying “You are not only hurting yourself, but you are hurting me also.” Symbolically, the malady is expressing her attitude perfectly. She is strongly dependent upon the Jesuit, even while she appears, and is in many ways solitary and aggressive; and she is afraid that their intimate life might suffer if the acceleration of his work experience is continued, and if his attitude toward it does not change.