“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

Much of what you discussed today was discussed by me a good deal of time ago. (True.) The suggestions I made at that time were not followed. Others were not, for both of your reasons, because the situation served both of your purposes to some extent.

I am speaking now of you both. You did not communicate your concern to each other, therefore you did not communicate your hopes. You, now, did for some time get into the habit of nonsmiling, which led Ruburt to further reinforce his own negative ideas of what you are thinking. But all of the symptoms now represent aspects of your lives that you have not faced in a normal above-the-board fashion. It is not so much that you have not solved them, as that you let communication about them gradually fade away.

Ruburt can be far more helpful than you realize, in helping with those solutions. Your lives in many ways did not satisfy you, but rather than accept this fact clearly and cast about for what changes or solutions there might be, both of you tried to keep everything precisely (underlined) as it was, make no changes, and live with the dissatisfaction that became a constant inner problem.

It naturally reflected all of your own attitudes, the similar and various ways the both of you have of facing reality. So when you discuss it the problem becomes an excellent focal point, showing you how you interact, how you interpret and misinterpret each other, and brings out quite clearly any basic conflicts that you have.

Such a discussion also serves to force Ruburt to say what he thinks, clarifies his own feelings, for he is not used to vocalizing them. Doing this alone can help him understand them more clearly.

Aggression or fear may rise up. If so face those feelings honestly, for they have been backed up within you. All of this serves to clear the air, opening the channels of communication, so that you do not have to be wondering what the other one is up to now.

Reasons have been given to you in the past, but you can break the habit now by expressing your emotions to each other, and so indeed you must. One of the deep disappointments that neither of you have faced is the difference between what your personal relationship is and what it could and should be.

Your relationship is a good one, compared to most an excellent one, but you know your inner potentials, and the potentials of that relationship, and how much you have to some degree failed it. Obviously you have not entirely failed by any means, and you have always maintained an underground basis of loyalty and love; but you are each deeply disappointed with that relationship compared to what you know it can be.

You can break the pattern then at any time. This should help you do so, by present, current action. Often you are so involved with feelings you had in the past that you do not know what you are feeling in the present. There are richly creative emotional founts within you both. Each of you know this and sense it.

Now I am telling you this: Ruburt is emotionally deprived, and that is what his physical body does when it knows it. He managed to go ahead creatively despite this, though at great difficulty.

Our sessions, both of your creative works, the good you have done and are doing, the health that you have maintained—no serious organic defects—all of this is testament to what you have done.