“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

I am speaking now of you both. You did not communicate your concern to each other, therefore you did not communicate your hopes. You, now, did for some time get into the habit of nonsmiling, which led Ruburt to further reinforce his own negative ideas of what you are thinking. But all of the symptoms now represent aspects of your lives that you have not faced in a normal above-the-board fashion. It is not so much that you have not solved them, as that you let communication about them gradually fade away.

The breaking of schedules is extremely beneficial for you also and would have made your outside job less burdensome in the past. It serves to give you a feeling of freedom, and open the way to unstructured emotional release. This, with the information given in the last session, if followed, can help you greatly, and clear Ruburt’s symptoms; but not if the advice is not followed.

The sexual aspect is but a symptom of this. You were both afraid in varying degrees of emotional contact of a strong nature. In the early days or years of your relationship these patterns were submerged largely. Your tendency to avoid such encounters was much more apparent then than Ruburt’s.

Your symptoms lay in a different area, and I am sure you know where. They show up in your creative work, for otherwise you would have been far freer. Your creative work therefore shows the emotional depriving aspects. You have not been able to let yourself go fully in them, as Ruburt has not been able to go freely with his body.

Now, this is the basic problem. The basic reasons for both Ruburt’s symptoms and the holdback in your own work, and the answer to both lies in learning how to release yourselves to yourselves, to let your own emotional natures relate to each other. You must get over the hump therefore of being afraid of your emotions, both of you.

The same feeling often pervades your own attitude when you think of Ruburt’s symptoms. You think you are being realistic. You are instead giving into old patterns of emotion, and you can break this habit. You are afraid then not of the negative emotional release—which meant, to the degree mentioned, safety—but of the joyful loving emotions. Part of this had to do with your father’s disappointment in business, and his (underlined) reaction to it.