“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

You went to some good degree toward breaking some of those patterns last evening and today, but the issues of your lives should be clearly discussed and not hidden. The problems were being taken out of the physical realm, where you could indeed handle them, into a mental realm, where you tried to hide them.

The sexual aspect is but a symptom of this. You were both afraid in varying degrees of emotional contact of a strong nature. In the early days or years of your relationship these patterns were submerged largely. Your tendency to avoid such encounters was much more apparent then than Ruburt’s.

Your relationship and your lives in general, you see, follow certain definite patterns set by you. Your work and your relationship are interwoven. You have not allowed yourselves the leeway, or the excuses either, that people do with families or a large number of interests. If you do not find emotional satisfaction with each other you do not find it, in other words. The whole problem however involves your work also, and solving one problem solves the other. Finding release in one gives you release in the other, and both of you chose therefore a life situation and framework in which precisely those problems you have tired to ignore should serve as challenges and impetuses.

You can break the pattern then at any time. This should help you do so, by present, current action. Often you are so involved with feelings you had in the past that you do not know what you are feeling in the present. There are richly creative emotional founts within you both. Each of you know this and sense it.

The same feeling often pervades your own attitude when you think of Ruburt’s symptoms. You think you are being realistic. You are instead giving into old patterns of emotion, and you can break this habit. You are afraid then not of the negative emotional release—which meant, to the degree mentioned, safety—but of the joyful loving emotions. Part of this had to do with your father’s disappointment in business, and his (underlined) reaction to it.