“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

You avoided meaningful (underlined) emotional encounters with each other often as a result. Neither of your ideas were tempered by the ideas of the other, therefore, nor were your feelings about these life problems. The rich emotional contact and encounters that are possible between you became clogged by inhibition and fears. Because of his particular nature, these agreements on your part to avoid such issues, and the resulting lack of positive encounters, was more damaging to Ruburt.

Ruburt was correct then in those statements he made last evening, having to do with the balance of routine and spontaneity, for his nature does need both. So does yours, incidentally, though this is not nearly as apparent. You were not living clearly in the sensual, physical world, in that large amounts of energy were being used to repress physical communication.

It naturally reflected all of your own attitudes, the similar and various ways the both of you have of facing reality. So when you discuss it the problem becomes an excellent focal point, showing you how you interact, how you interpret and misinterpret each other, and brings out quite clearly any basic conflicts that you have.

The sexual aspect is but a symptom of this. You were both afraid in varying degrees of emotional contact of a strong nature. In the early days or years of your relationship these patterns were submerged largely. Your tendency to avoid such encounters was much more apparent then than Ruburt’s.

Now, this is the basic problem. The basic reasons for both Ruburt’s symptoms and the holdback in your own work, and the answer to both lies in learning how to release yourselves to yourselves, to let your own emotional natures relate to each other. You must get over the hump therefore of being afraid of your emotions, both of you.

Gradually he inhibited the love and joy, and you the negatives until your lives lacked those natural rises and falls in feelings in tone. You set yourself against your feelings, allowing them release in certain areas only under certain conditions, and in largely impersonal as opposed to intimate areas.