“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(Yet, my father was very intelligent and had a good job and held many responsible positions in the community. Others looked to him for guidance. I had felt my dad was very intelligent.)

Now this also overshadows your relationship with the males to whom you have come in contact. For you have been, on the one hand, terrified of them, and on the other hand wanted a normal relationship. Give me a moment here —on the one hand you desire more from a relationship with a man than you have any right to expect. No human being could ever deliver what you expect a man to deliver in a relationship. This is because you see the male in terms inspired in you when you were a child. You were terrified of the male, your father. On the other hand, you felt that he did contain wisdom, truth, almost godlike qualities. These qualities you attempt to project into the male that you meet. At the same time you are also terrified because of this background. No man can possibly be as godlike as your inner conception. Therefore, each man is bound to disappoint you. At the same time, you hope and pray subconsciously that the man will disappoint you because this male in your mind has godlike qualities that attract you; on the other, you see him as all powerful and as one who gives out punishment and one who is unreasoning and cruel because you felt that your father was cruel. You are afraid, so to speak, to come under a man’s thumb for this reason, to come under his domination. For to do so is to place yourself in a humble position and a frightening position underneath the male figure. Your terror as a child gave you an inner idea of reality and family group whereby you saw yourself completely powerless and helpless under the domination of this father figure. He was the source of all and yet he could at the same time take all away. And you felt, at the same time, that he would indeed do so. Because you were a male in past lives, you resented this all the more strongly. Give us a moment.

Now, you have, if you will forgive me, consistently chosen those males within whom you sensed feminine qualities. And this was to protect you. You felt that the feminine qualities within the male forespoke of a gentle nature, that would protect you from the overall male violence of which you were afraid and which you exaggerated, because of early impressions. When you understand this material I have given you this evening, it will help you and you should read it often. Bringing this out in the open will automatically help you to rid yourself of these fears. They will not automatically disappear overnight, but they will begin to diminish. It is your idea to use this toy this evening and not mine, so I am not going to worry about my remarks being recorded for posterity. This is your worry.

(Long pause.) He was a woman. His present mother and father were both brothers…the American Revolutionary period, the same geographical area as now. His brothers were involved, it would seem, as spies. Your Mr. Reed as their sister told where they were and broke under pressure and fear. Concord… a cellar beneath an old inn… stone walls, floor partially dirt. Your Mr. Reed, then the sister, was hiding with the brothers here. She went outside for provisions. She was captured and gave the hiding place and could not then return to warn her brothers. She felt then that she had abandoned them and betrayed them. There was something done then to her right leg. A relative was responsible for an injury inflicted on her right leg connected with a horse.