“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

The emotionalism within the household seemed to be threatening, and in a free form. You never knew when it would erupt, and as a child you felt helpless before it. Through precise renderings you felt that you imprisoned it, and therefore controlled it. In the beginning this had quite magical connotations for you. Basically you have felt this magical commitment to realistic work, for to leave it would be to break the lines of this imprisonment, letting loose the emotions that you feared.

You are recognizing certain limitations that these developments put upon you. The inner attitudes must be completely changed, though your methods and styles need not necessarily change one iota. It would help you however to attempt larger work. You are afraid of tackling too much feeling at once, and the mere fact of working larger would free you from this to some considerable extent.

Working with subjects that initiate joy within you will also help free you, though you are to some extent frightened even of joy, distrusting it. Still you will experience freedom when you deal with subjects that are evocative to you, of the joy of life or abundance of nature. (Pause.)

Your materials must always serve your inner vision or you will be dissatisfied with them. You must be bold in following the inner vision, free enough to follow it. You have been somewhat hampered by your father’s overcautiousness and timidity. This can be resolved however.