“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

Now. Ruburt did indeed hear me today.

Now. (Smile, eyes open.) Some beneficial projection is going on here also for a change, as Ruburt psychically projects outward the last of important inner disturbances onto the ghost images, which are then completely, altered into constructive and healthy images.

Now these changes: let us speak of them. I have told you the very practical and symbolic meaning behind the painting and alteration of your physical environment. There is also more involved. As you know, your dwelling has always represented a temple to Ruburt, and the relationship between you. Therefore the alteration for the better represents his realization of a more beneficial relationship, and gives him a hand in it—represents his willingness to make necessary inner alterations also.

The contrasting color arrangement is a most healthy acceptance on his part of the spontaneous portion of his own personality. In a large manner in the past, he went along with your ideas involving the overall atmosphere—underline overall—of the apartment, feeling you would find contrasting elements irritants. The spontaneity is finding beneficial release. He is not so afraid now of making mistakes, or of trusting his own judgment, though he thinks it might conflict with your ideas in any given case. Hence his painting the cupboards blue.

Now these changes have taken work, energy and time. Precisely because they have, they have validity in physical terms, and show the psychic impetus behind them. Do you want a break?

Now, you both had much to do with bringing these events about. Neither of you said no to your Peter, and more important you did not say no to Ruburt. His somewhat induced invitation represented a new use of freedom. On both of your parts, the boy’s visit will show that you have once again enough energy to use elsewhere.

The healthy exuberant feelings of all your anticipated guests will also benefit you both, and you will be able to help them. There will be mutual benefits. Ruburt should definitely now concentrate on his book during the night hours, perhaps thinking of poetry toward dawn.

Now, he thought as a child that every night was literally a death, and every dawn literally a rebirth. He was terrified that his mother had died during the night when he was very young, and could not help him. She could not, you see, climb the stairs at his call. Later he felt that she would either commit suicide or kill them both while he slept, and he feared the night. (Pause.) In times of stress the old stay-awake-at-night fearful pattern reoccurs. In the deepest trouble he doubted your feeling for him also, and in exaggerated panic felt that you would feel released if he died, as he felt that he would feel released as an adolescent if his mother died. For in those hours he saw himself crippled as she was, and a stone about your neck.

This frightening identification has lost just about all of its strength. No significant vitality is now tied up there. The writing at night provides constructive outlet, you see, for any lingering conflicts of this nature, and is his way of triumphing over them in work.

Now, I suggest he take vitamins. Before, his system would not utilize them regardless. For several months they will be of help on the physical level, showing his intent you see, carried out in physical terms.