“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

A complete change of color is strongly recommended. A gay contrasting color. These measures will dissipate lingering ghost images and associations. The new bath towels, incidentally, these are an excellent idea. Ruburt was strongly attracted to your new rug because of the contrast, this in itself allows steady and harmonious expression of his own personality.

A small remark here. Ruburt is still slightly distrustful of the new conditions, asking will they last. This results in the lingering strong sensitivities, which will vanish as he becomes reassured. He was literally terrified. I cannot stress this too strongly. It is taking him a while to realize that he is free. But he is doing so, and energy is being released and is available to him, that was not available earlier.

Soon the old native exuberance will completely return, and now there will be a direction for it. A very small point here for you. You resented your mother’s frequent house cleaning for several reasons. First of all you deeply feared that in rearranging her house she was merely playing with surface arrangements, and would not touch the deeper dilemmas of the family.

But you also feared the opposite, that she would disrupt a status quo that was highly delicate. Unpleasant but bearable, and that the resulting situation would be pure chaos and disruption. You have feared disruption, not realizing that it results in creation, and yes, in birth.

You did not want children, physically speaking. You wanted to reach out in the way that people do when they have children. You wanted a fulfillment indeed, that would of course have physical repercussions in three-dimensional terms, but that was not primarily physical.

Those who are not completely focused in physical reality will look for other ways of fulfilling their needs. As a rule with other issues taken into consideration, they will not have children. They will be left with the need for fulfillment however. This was your case and Ruburt’s.

I am hardly a child substitute, you see. Conversely, if you had a child it would have been much more difficult for you to make communication with me, because of the direction of your own energy and focus. Because of the physical connotations Ruburt’s age was a fairly significant circumstance as far as the beginning (underlined) of his development was concerned. He finally knew that it would not be in usual physical terms.

He was intellectually certain of this in the past, but not emotionally certain. The same can be said in your case. Now you amplify our communications in a very highly charged manner. This is why your relationship with Ruburt, you see, is so important in the sessions. When he is confident of you, he is free in the sessions.

(9:58. Jane again was “out of it”. Resume at 10:10.)