“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

Any spontaneity became suspect however, except artistic spontaneity. For various reasons, not necessary in this discussion, the tendency was carried over with Ruburt’s first husband. At the same time through adolescence the quality of the ego had not sufficiently shown its true character as yet. The spontaneity did erupt in constant nervous behavior, and erratic behavior. He was constantly told to slow down, to use discipline, and this reinforced the fear that what he was, was fearful, powerful, evil, and best hidden.

Now all of this should be taken with other material that I have given you, for all these reasons clicked together at the time. His book was a good one and he was proud of it. But because he felt at this time unworthy, for the reasons given, then he must punish himself for its success, artistically speaking. I can tell you that our work and the stability of our sessions has been of great aid in keeping the symptoms under some control. Had this happened before our sessions the difficulty would literally have been most severe, with other bad physical symptoms.