“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

There is much more here. However he began his creative life very early as an outlet, you see, for aggressive and violent feelings. As an infant and a young child he had a strong temper, which terrified him, and he indulged in childish tantrums. Children know much more than they are given credit for.

(Break at 9:32. Jane was as well dissociated, she said, as she has ever been: “He had me so that I was more him than me… Now, how did he do that?” She could have been talking about a stranger, she continued, yet knew what she was saying and that she talked about herself.

Now. It has always been extremely difficult for him to defend himself physically. As a child he simply would not do so, and to make matters worse the mother taunted him for being a coward.

Ruburt knew this well. He has since grown to like all animals but at the moment of the attack, you see, the cat instantly became this personification of evil to him, and again his primary concern was to flee. There was never an instant in the whole affair when he thought of striking back.

It is only when a break occurs, you see, when the creative energy blocks up, that such difficulties arise. For these reasons it pains him deeply to write, even to an editor, words that are not docile.

When this builds up and enough small legitimate injustices are borne, docilely, then we have an explosion of a sorts. Everyone else you see has a right to gripe, he feels subconsciously, but he cannot. He is terrified to do so. When he manages to do so he is jubilant out of all proportion. His swearing you see allows him leeway.

All of this needs to be said, you see. You are both learning at a rather amazing rate. In the past you turned some repressed violence inward against yourself. Ruburt’s selling jobs were very practical for a time, for they allowed him to release aggressive feelings. You become angry when you think, rightly, that Ruburt is too docile in his dealings, but this is because you are angry at your own lack of power as a child to retaliate against the atmosphere of violence that you sensed in the child’s home.

Close by him now a small box with a miscellany of objects. (Pause at 10:35.) Perhaps the box of walnut, or there is a walnut connection here.

Subconsciously he feels that you are saying shut up, and this angers, humiliates and bewilders him. He struggles against such disclosures to begin with. Instead you see methods can be used to direct the emotions in other channels. You can get him to talk about other matters by asking for example about what he has written for the day. The subject chosen by you must be one in which he is immensely interested however. He will understand that you are merely trying to redirect him, and will not feel that you are restraining his freedom to say what he wants to say. He will understand what you are doing, but that is all right. He knows the emotional situation with your mother, and will not object.

There is a man who wears a hat in his office who will be connected with one of these books. It is a characteristic of his. He is perhaps 46, but he is definitely between 46 and 56. (Pause.) There is a G  connected with him.

Ruburt denied the cat its usual psychic reinforcement also, you see. Incidentally, working with the earth will almost always restore him.