“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

Primarily they refer to your own subconscious feelings toward your father. Not only in regard to yourself, but in regard to your younger brother, and to Ruburt. Now this is on one level, and for a few moments we shall speak about the dreams on this level only.

Ruburt could transcribe the notes, and I could speak to you more clearly.

In the third dream you face a painless execution which is to be carried out by your father, who will give you the needle. You see Ruburt, who is on a swing, and you are concerned and sad. Later you find yourself unhurt. You wander about, see Ruburt once more, and again you are concerned for him.

In the earlier dreams you were certain of your capacity to survive the situation which you feared. In this dream you faced the possibility that you would not survive so easily. Ruburt is in this episode because now you worry about the effect of your own reaction upon his condition in general.

In the end however you have survived. You are still concerned for Ruburt because you realize that as a matter of survival added funds for your family would have to come from his efforts, since your own painting time is too important to lose. Your father personally did not appear because literally you could not see him doing this to you. So you did not see him give you the needle.

For a very good reason you have forgotten a portion of the dream. At the last moment you simply walked out of the room, and refused to have this done to you. You did not remember this detail simply because it seems to you that you should make every sacrifice for your father. The concern and sadness you felt then, for Ruburt, was false, and added on to hide the fact that you had refused to be sacrificed.