“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

She felt that it was her responsibility to have a child, and so she did. At the same time, because of the child’s defect, she managed to produce a child who was relatively free of those pressures against which she reacted. She produced in other words an idiot, who was in his own way supremely invulnerable to the realization of misfortune, a child who would not grow mentally into an adult, and a child who would remain secure in a relatively eternal childhood.

To some extent she resembled her mother. Her vanity, however, was not a characteristic woman’s vanity. Her vanity was perhaps the one characteristic that she shared with other members of the family. She felt she was set apart, but also that she was set apart because she could not tolerate violence. Violence frightened her deeply.

She was gentle, and yet displayed a characteristic hauteur, in that she felt that the world was soiled, and so she would come in contact with it as little as possible.

He did not tell her because he knew she would have had no part of him. So when she discovered this other part of him she felt betrayed. To some extent she was, since she had been honest with him. Then when she discovered that he was not willing or able to go either way, or pay either price, she was enraged and embittered, and did not think of him as a man. So she hated this sister of his and thought: was this, this squalor, what he wanted? And she looked at Jay and was envious, and hated him for being the sort of man she wanted and did not get.

You Aunt Ella was much less frightened of death than anyone might suppose. She loved life, if not the world, but she did not believe that death was really an end. She felt her will nearby. For several years she had begun to retreat from this existence, and as she did so she became happier.