“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(This was her last conscious thought. Immediately the same voice effect again manifested itself in no uncertain terms, and Jane then swept through the long poem without pause. Her voice did not bother her; indeed it became very loud and powerful and dramatic, very vibrant. She remained seated. She held the book in her right hand, and used many gestures with her left hand that were unlike her usual mannerisms. Almost at once it became apparent that the psychic phenomenon taking place, whether or not it involved a medium’s contact with Father Trainor, was much superior to the version already on tape.

(Since we had been taken by surprise by this development, we had made no plans to record the reading. I hesitated to interrupt, remembering Seth’s comments about the value of spontaneity. Jane’s eyes were open, but much darker and more luminous than usual. At times the almost deafening power of her voice, and its emotional content, were indeed thrilling. At the end of the reading Jane closed her eyes; when she opened them again she was out of the trance. She said she was subjectively aware of the gestures she executed with her left hand, yet she felt the hand was not really hers at the time. She felt that it was a fatter hand, belonging to a much heavier arm. Father Trainor, in the photograph we have of him, was a very heavyset man. Bill Gallagher felt that while she was reading Jane spoke with a brogue. Father Trainor was Irish.

We will not indeed at this time go into all the circumstances involved in the illness about which we have been questioned at this time. Nevertheless, we do here find a personality who has been, in this life, from an early age, involved in a most complicated network of emotional involvement, concerning both mother and father—and do I speak too quickly for you, Joseph?

There is much that the personality can do to help his own situation, as indeed we shall see; we also find an involvement here between both families of the man and the woman in past existences, and for this reason a very close psychic framework has been built up here.

The physical condition, having its basis in past relationships, nevertheless can indeed be settled to the personality’s satisfaction.

May I here add for our friend Ruburt’s satisfaction that the performance of which he was so skeptical, was indeed, despite all his protests, quite legitimate. Now he can stew over that.

I must here express my gratitude indeed that Ruburt deign to allow this unscheduled session, particularly since we missed our own last scheduled one. But I shall not badger him, as I believe indeed he badgers himself enough. I will now take my leave and give you a short break.

I should warn you that I am indeed feeling rather humorous myself this evening, and we have been so besieged with weighty matters that I have not had the opportunity to express myself in the more sociable fashion that I would like. So I take this opportunity to give my greetings to you both, and I will now as promised let you take your break.

There was indeed, also, an incident that occurred when the woman was six years old, having to do with the resulting fear of a feline family.

I want here, Joseph, to make one note for our own benefit, that should be included with our material on the nature of action, if indeed our two visitors will for a moment forgive me. Are you ready?

Now, involving the performance on Ruburt’s part this evening, we have here once more another example of the nature in which action is changed by itself. For indeed, as it was possible for Ruburt to some slight degree to allow her friend to speak, nevertheless the action involved in the whole situation nevertheless changed not only Ruburt, but also necessarily changed her Father Trainor, in that any action of its own nature can never remain the same.

An aside here: the incident involving the woman had mainly to do—I suggest here, my esteemed Joseph, that perhaps you watch Ruburt’s features. And I would also like to mention the fact that indeed the woman in our gathering, Aniac, does indeed have abilities that are not being used, and possibilities for energy focus which she would do well to explore.

Were it not for the relationships between these two, then indeed the condition of the male would be more critical; and here we come to an interesting point.

While indeed I try to understand his ways, nevertheless I find it most difficult to understand on his part these mountains of self-doubt. I am hardly a portion of his personality. Were I a secondary personality of his, I would exhibit those characteristics that are inhibited in his personality, though I must admit I find it difficult to discover where he is inhibited. A less inhibited personality is difficult to find.

—potbellied Buddha image, nor indeed any manifestation of your conception of a ghostly spirit that drifts in out of the night. It is only your own ignorance, and if you will excuse me, the superstition of the multitudes, that would give you the idea that I am some ghost of a nether world.

I have gone along, you must admit, with extreme good will, and suffered indeed all of Ruburt’s most painful and conscientious objections. The fact merely remains that I am who I am, and I am not Ruburt.

Not only that, it is simply a fact that your scientists will indeed discover, and no misty, magical superstition, that consciousness, of itself and because of its nature, forms physical matter. Because I once inhabited physical matter, as you all do now, does not mean that I am now some esoteric, occult creature of dim spiritualistic rather doubtful origins, who manages to invade gullible and neurotic consciousness.

I have better use for my time, and Ruburt certainly has better use for his own. From the beginning I was indeed grateful that Ruburt was not—

—of a gullible, pseudomystical type of temperament. Nevertheless I cannot help but grow annoyed when I am literally besieged with the protests meant to insist upon his sanity, the point being that if he is sane, then I must be some nefarious seven-eyed monster. He does indeed give acquiescence for these sessions, and I am indeed fond of you both. I have been aware that you do not care, particularly, for the opinion of your fellow men. But our Ruburt, who has never cared for the opinion of his fellow men, now rises up in great worry. What is he afraid of?

Indeed the answer is only too obvious: the great writer fears to be found out; and why? Because the words he speaks are not his own. He knows only too well the importance of these sessions, and I am not afraid of his ego, for even his ego knows.

I will now suggest your break, and I will discuss to some greater degree data concerning your guests. And if I took time out for this discussion, it is indeed because for once I have grown impatient. For much of this on Ruburt’s part is indeed pretense—not conscious pretense, but pretense. He knows full well not only the importance of the sessions, personally, but he knows the far-reaching consequences of these sessions, and he is indeed quite able to deal with the consequences.

Nor do I here mean to depreciate Ruburt either, for I also am only too aware of those psychological tests which shall be put to us; and it should be obvious to you that in this respect your precious privacy is indeed invaded, and will be. None of you shall regret this night.

(Break at 12:21. Jane was indeed fully dissociated. She was not aware that she had been taking herself to task so vehemently. Her manner had quieted somewhat just before break.

If indeed it is understood that this personality, as with many personalities, has been materialized in feminine form, then these perfectly natural dependent feelings are found to be merely residues from previous personality patterns. And a word here should be said, indeed, concerning the distortive ideas that arise concerning dependency and passivity.

However, the personality does not seem at this time able to realize that this inhibited passivity is indeed the basis for all resultant aggressive behavior.

I myself am in fine fettle. However I realize that I am somewhat freer than you, and I will indeed, my Joseph, end the session at your request.

I am most pleased to meet with you both, and I have no doubt that we shall indeed have other communications in these sessions. There is, Joseph, an importance here that you have not seen, but perhaps at our next session I will make it clear.

There is much concerning the laws of energy which I have not yet explained to you, and so it is inevitable that our sessions are dependent upon his abilities to utilize energy. He has indeed done very well. But for a while yet we are still dependent upon his utilization of energy.

Indeed I do occasionally, as you saw this evening, badger him, but for his own good; and we are closer this evening than we have been for some time. Closer, in fact, than we have ever been, and I am permitted here with Ruburt’s eyes quite open, to sit with you and chat.

I never want to take too much of his energy, and you are indeed a watchdog in this respect, as is right. Nevertheless, I felt that it was legitimate to take this extra time to speak with you, since there are few occasions when Ruburt’s psychic abilities and energies are sufficiently attuned so that we can work together in this manner.

The physical changes in his features were fairly obvious, and I am indeed sorry that you did not perceive their nature. I do not know if you can perceive the difference in the emotional proximity this evening between us now. And if I do badger Ruburt as I did this evening, it is because I too have an emotional reaction in all of this.

There is what amounts at times to a wall that separates us, as far as emotion is concerned, and this is our Ruburt’s doing, though of course he does not do it deliberately. Again, the strength and indeed the stubbornness of his ego, made the sessions possible, for without it in the beginning there would have been difficulty in maintaining necessary stability.

I have been with you this evening in a manner which has not been possible lately. We have been involved in variations of the trance state, while at the same time anxious to continue our material, so that the two ventures have been tied into one. It has taken me a while indeed before we could reach this point of more intimate communication.

I quail before your quite human limitations, and if I smile it is not indeed within ridicule—

(During this break, since Jane’s voice had again been very low and dry, almost a whisper, I made the unfortunate remark that her heavy smoking this evening was responsible. This brought on her most spectacular voice display of any of the sessions to date, bar none. She began speaking in a voice that was at least as loud as that used in the Father Trainor experiment earlier this evening, and that was loud indeed. Resume at 2:05.)

The hoarseness on Ruburt’s part is not because of the endless cigarettes which he has smoked, for I could indeed continue along these lines, and with this voice, as long as I desired.

—that the whisper was involved. Tonight his abilities allow my communications to come through so well! But I could indeed blow apart the rooftops, in theory, if I so chose.

—I could indeed give them to you so that there would be no doubt as to the origin of the voice involved. I could indeed, if I were so inclined, give you voice changes that would have the neighbors down upon your shoulders—

I can indeed feel you quail at the volume of my voice (louder again), considering the ungodly hour (louder yet, really loud, blasting out with a smile, to soon quiet again), and so I will lower it. But I would like it understood that now, if I so chose, there would be no doubt (louder, very loud) as to my identity (and now also deeper) or my abilities.

With Ruburt’s consent however, and I have it, I could make such a blast of masculine voice that you would indeed be embarrassed when the neighbors complained (louder). It is to show my humorous consideration for your feelings that I do not so indulge (louder).

It is this impossibility of speaking in normal tones, in normal conversation with you, and indeed with Ruburt, that does annoy me at times. If you knew of our histories in detail, it would not surprise you, and there would be much more that you would understand.

I will indeed close, but you will find that the benefits of this session are more long-lasting than either of you can now suppose.