“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(Was left with light feeling [not a weakness or anything], feeling as if I could rise up bodily, and quite definite sensation of having an empty space above my wrists. Took our cat out though, sat on steps waiting for Rob to come home from work; feeling diminished. Got lunch, told Rob what happened, left house for walk to post office to mail manuscript, and to grocery store. During lunch very slight but noticeable lightness in wrists and hands. Mentioned it, but didn’t think it at all important. Intended to do my errands, come home and write from 1:30 till 4:30.

(Left; started way home. By now, however, felt as if lightness rose through body, and this changed so that suddenly I felt as if lower part of body had dissolved completely, up to chest. No muscular knowledge of carrying bag with three quarts of milk, and book and cigarettes that I’d purchased at all. Suddenly worried; realized for the first time that I wasn’t in state of something like just plain extraordinary good humor or good health or ordinary but unusual exuberance. First, I was aware that I felt as if body had dissolved below chest; but then thought that it really might have. Went up curb on Church St.; beyond doubt it took no effort at all; the usual effort you feel in lifting feet for steps. Shoes bothered me though; they seemed heavy, holding me down. I know this is silly, but felt scared that if lower part of body was dissolved; and all that was left was chest and shoulder and head region, then I would just fall down; a chest, shoulders, and head on street. Didn’t think I was going to do this; but the image popped into my head. By this time, worried to some degree but still enjoying the delightful...suspension...looked from Walnut Street through yards, to my own windows that showed through trees. Noticed that it seemed that I was floating by...rather than walking. Afraid I might...leave body or something...unprotected in street. Got home. Told Rob. He made me drink coffee, had me sniff ammonia.

(Got home about 1:50 PM Feelings continued, though beginning to lessen. At 3 PM though, just after I began writing this all down, went to downstairs front door to see if mailman had come, still felt same sensations though to lesser degree. Rob and I in living room area; I told him about the mailman and all of a sudden I had the odd and striking feeling as I walked around my table that I passed through a “hole of nothingness”—and passed out of it again immediately. It is now 4:15. I feel more like myself now, though tired. In fact, I’m OK now, or close to it.

(As soon as Jane returned home from doing her errands and mentioned that she still “felt funny”, I suspected that we would see something like a repetition of her adventure of January 10, 1964, Volume 1, page 83. On page 89, in the 100th session, Seth had stated that Jane could allow herself more freedom now, and since she had mentioned the feeling of what she calls ecstasy to me this noon, I thought she was indeed doing more than usual. I also wondered whether she had done too much.

(When she returned home her eyes were very clear, her skin color good, her pulse normal. Her hands also felt normal. Her manner was quite smiling and relaxed and at the same time surprised. I was not concerned particularly, except on the general score that in these experiments I prefer to make haste slowly. She had no trouble talking, although as she walked about at times I noticed a lilt to her step; at other times her knees would bend a little more than usual, as though her legs were rubbery; but to no great degree.

(Ever since she traveled to her home town, Saratoga, NY, psychically, Jane has wanted to travel again. (See Volume 2, page 65, April 30, 1964.) She believes that her experience today was an effort at travel, and wondered why it was apparently so much more difficult to accomplish now than it was last April. Seth deals with the problem somewhat in the following, 104th, session.)