“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(Through last week, also, Jane had enjoyed a burst of painting activity after a rather long time away from it. She enjoyed herself doing these pictures very much, and we discussed them at length. She sensed a conflict between what she wanted to portray, and her limited technical abilities in getting the actual images on canvas. I thought her work was better than ever, surprisingly so, and that her ideas were good and her extremely personal handling of them in paint very fresh. Jane persisted in thinking of her paintings as childish.

(It will be recalled that at various times Seth has said that Bill Macdonnel has much natural psychic ability, and that it is largely untrained. Seth stated that Bill was gifted in many lines of psychic ability, among them the perception of apparitions. Seth also stated that Jane and I did not see as much as we might because we were both too “fussy” about what we would allow ourselves to see.

(I would like to say here that recently Jane had remarked, several times, that she would feel better if she herself could see some physical evidence of psychic phenomena. She had not seen the apparition, nor of course had I, and she had not been able to see the change in her features, again described in the 68th session. Even though I reminded her that she was the prime mover in the sessions, she still expressed the wish to “see something” that would “prove” to her that the material was legitimate. We both remembered of course that long ago Seth had said in no uncertain terms that he was not in favor of demonstrations for demonstrations’ sake, and that he would not perform on call.

(Since the subject had been under discussion for some time by now, so that a certain mood or feeling might be said to have been engendered, Jane remarked that she could feel Seth “buzzing around.” This announcement did not mean much to us, and we paid little attention. Instead we tried to discern the form Bill said he could see in the doorway. We did not succeed.

I have been with you this evening for some time, as you no doubt knew. Notes are not particularly necessary to what I have to say; and Joseph, you should enjoy the rest.

Ruburt has been in search of discipline. He was always in search of the discipline he lacked. His intuitions were always very strong. Well, now he has his discipline, but it has been overdone. It has come to hamper the very strong intuitions, and it must be lessened. Spontaneity, inner spontaneity must be restored. He is now doing better with his psychological time experiments, and he must let this spontaneity expand into other aspects of his life. Ruburt must be fully committed to these sessions for them to accelerate in scope.

If he wants physical effects he shall have his physical effects. But I repeat, three at this time are necessary.

Also, Mark, you should not be afraid of your dreams. They do not mean what you think they mean. They are, briefly, part of your whole self. You have been in contact with other parts of yourself for a long time. You have learned more in the last year than you learned in the last fifteen. If you want to learn more about your dreams and what they really mean, I will discuss them in a regular session. But above all you should move into your own place.

(Telling us about his recent dream and apparition experiences, Bill had mentioned that at times when his eyes were closed he was aware of the feeling of a white light, or glow, that varied in intensity at different times. Jane was interested in this description because it tallied with an effect she attains quite often in psychological time experiments—this feeling of a light within, even though the eyelids are squeezed tightly shut. At times Jane has seen images after the appearance of this inner light, but Bill has seen only the light. I have experienced this type of inner glow on a few isolated occasions, but have seen few images in this manner.)

We have all known each other in the past. We have been more closely connected than you can imagine, and have had more experience in different realms than you can now know. I cannot at this time make it all clear to you. But there will be reunions and reminiscences, mark my words.

Ruburt’s psychological time experience recently was correct, in that he will soon hear about a sale. I cannot tell you more about this now.

(See Jane’s psychological time experience of October 30, page 102.)

The physical side of these sessions is accepted by Joseph. He knows what he sees, but perhaps we can aid in our Ruburt’s commitment. He demands proof of the validity of this material, his psychological time experiences notwithstanding. He demands physical effects and then freezes up. He questions everything that happens in the sessions, and sometimes I think he believes none of it.

(I did not think to note the time the session ended, but certainly it was within half an hour. Jane said Seth knocked her out quickly, and that it was her deepest trance except for the self-induced one of January 10, 1964. See Volume 1, page 83. Yet as usual she could hear herself speaking, although she could not follow the sense of what she was saying, nor did she try to.

(From Jane’s psychological time notebook:

(Later, resting on bed after work with eyes closed, saw a quick but rather violent vision of a round, very bright daylight-type light. But this light seemed to be clearer than daylight, and to be almost like a mirror that was reflecting another mirror. At the same time it spun around, or else the dark area around it spun around, with a sudden violence that actually made me dizzy. Yet the whole thing was incredibly brief.)

(From my psychological time notebook: