“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(Last Wednesday afternoon, April 22, 1964, Jim Beckett visited me briefly. He is a computer service technician whom Jane and I had met but two or three times some months ago, before the sessions began. We became acquainted with him when he was a TV repairman. He is also a ham radio operator and a science-fiction fan; thus the three of us got along well from the beginning, when we met Jim as he called to service our TV. But after this first acquaintance we had not seen him since, and often wondered what happened to him.

(Jim’s friend was unable to come, but Jim, Bill, Jane and I began to discuss Seth at about 7:30 Friday night. We also discussed the letter of April 23, received today, from the A.S.P.R., asking us to cease sending in copies of these sessions unless they contained specific information of Seth’s promised tests. Jane and I feel that we cannot rush her development, nor do we have any desire to, so the letter left us somewhat at a loss; we finally decided to let events take their course, and send the A.S.P.R. any data in which they might be interested, when, if ever, it manifested itself.

(Bill wanted to hear again the transcript of the 46th session which he witnessed; since I did not have it typed up yet I began to read it to him. It was quite hilarious and we had some laughs over it; but as I finished reading at about 9:45 PM, I became aware that I was experiencing a feeling of enlargement in the index and second finger of my right hand. Bill stated that in his opinion these two fingers were noticeably “fatter” than the corresponding two on my left hand. I then cut narrow strips of paper and had Bill measure and mark the circumference of each finger, planning to check these measurements when the sensation had passed. This is the system I plan to use to check Jane’s hands also.

(I then showed Jim and Bill the two drawings of my visions of the night before; I did the drawings this afternoon. The drawing of the head, with the brimming eyes, struck Jim rather forcibly. In his quiet way he said the drawing was very disturbing to him, and mentioned this several times after I had put them away. Both Jim and Bill thought the other one, of the girl and dog, quite gruesome. As it happened, both drawings were rather successful; I felt I had done a good job of getting my memory of the visions down on paper.

(At 10:25 Jane abruptly handed to me a paper and pencil and pointed to the table. I had my own equipment handy however, and grabbed them up. Jane began to dictate then in a strong and somewhat deeper voice, pacing rather energetically. It was the first session with more than one witness. Note, also, that at the close of the 46th session, Seth had remarked that he would “speak to you Monday if not before.”)

His abilities along electronic lines are not at all surprising, having been developed in various ways through previous existences. He was involved with esoteric religious ceremonies and concerned with certain religious, scientific, and psychic experiments long before your continent was civilized. He was a priest 4,000 years ago.

These abilities have manifested themselves in various ways, and he has often taken upon himself tasks also of a sacrificial nature. In past lives he never enjoyed the fleshy nature with which you Joseph, and Ruburt, and Mark were so outlandishly endowed. He was in almost all cases an esthetic personality, four times a woman; two of these times a priestess, and once as a nun in the Middle Ages. The personality in many respects has been rigid, in that its purpose was so undeviatingly certain and severe that it allowed no room for levity or diversion.

(Break at 10:45. Jane was dissociated as usual. She said that something had made Seth angry this evening; she thought it had to do with our attitude and comments after we had received the letter from the A.S.P.R.

(Jim reported that he felt strong chills as the session got underway, and that he still felt them to a lesser degree during break. When Jane began dictating again her voice was as strong as before, and as emphatic. Resume at 10:50.)

Ruburt was quite correct. I found both of your attitudes earlier this evening to be extremely smug. You find it easy to blame others for not having the knowledge that you have thus far obtained, when you forget that I had much to do with choosing who would receive the knowledge. The situation and the time and the growth of your own abilities had something to do with this. While I am certainly not one given to humility, nevertheless your smugness is truly astronomical.

Roarck, in one of his past existences, was concerned with just such problems. However the society with which he was involved was of course seeped in its own ignorance, as your society is seeped in its now.

The one room is extremely large. There is the sound of activity. The picture I believe was once between two walls. Somewhere nearby is the color red, perhaps in a linoleum. The picture is undamaged, though I seem to see two small marks in the lower left-hand corner.

Some night I will address many people, all of whom knew me, and many of whom knew each other. When Ruburt’s abilities mature, and when if ever he is able to forget that awesome ego, we will really show some signs. I was not originally in favor of gaudy displays. However, your precious Psychic Society has made me feel as if I would like to give them a good boot.

Since this is an unscheduled session I will not keep you, but I am extremely pleased, both because Mark finally made it to a session the other night, finally after knowing about the sessions for months, and also that Roarck has finally been drawn here. As a footnote, Roarck, you came too early the first time. I was not ready yet.

Your pussycat knew, or sensed, that I was here. You sensed it, hence the swelling of your hands, which is only a symptom of the workings of one particular inner sense. Roarck knew it when he saw your picture.

The picture which you drew was the result of a vision you received last night, and my dear friends, the picture represents two things. I suggest a brief break, and I will then go into the picture’s significance.

(Break at 11:15. Jane was fully dissociated. Jim felt more comfortable now, his chills had abated; my hand was okay; and Bill had a list of perhaps two dozen instances wherein he had known beforehand what series of words Jane would use to present certain thoughts. The phrases were three and four words long.

(Bill was also curious to know why he had written down, in his own notes, that Jim was once a monk; whereas Seth had stated that Jim had been a nun, in the Middle Ages.

The picture is a composite of two images having to do with Roarck. You knew he was coming consciously, and in your inner vision you saw many things and made of them one image. The eyes brimming with tears represent his eyes as they have often been, esthetic, compassionate and overwhelmed. The laughing face, however, represents something else. It represents Roarck’s overall entity—

There is much more to be said here. Even now until the almost immediate present, Roarck has followed in this life his esthetic leaning. He chose to be born under rather poor circumstances, and until the near present made little real or rather effective attempts, but only halfhearted attempts, to seek better conditions for his present personality. He was not an only child, and yet he felt himself to be an only child.

There is a strong inclination toward protection in his personality. This is partially wholesome and partially the result of fear on his part. I hope that he will attend a regular session. He was also in Mesopotamia.

Mark took the word nun for monk, because he knew Roarck when Roarck was a priest, and substituted monk really for priest.

The desire for discovery, and the ability to create are strong in all of you, and also in others who will come here. In various ways you have struggled with psychic realities; and Mark and Roarck are also involved with practical considerations involving women, as earlier Ruburt was involved with her Walter, and you, Joseph, were also involved.

(End at 11:40. Jane was dissociated as usual. Bill received a nine-word sentence of Jane’s during delivery, before she voiced it. He gave me his notes to put into the record. Jim stated that the personal information about himself was correct, although neither Jane nor myself had any knowledge of these things, having met him but briefly on a few occasions some months ago.

(Since my hand phenomena had disappeared by now, I was curious to check the measurements of my fingers now against those Bill had made earlier. The index finger of my right hand checked out at approximately the same circumference– 2 ”. My second finger, wherein I had been most strongly aware of the feeling of enlargement, had measured 2 ” at the time; its circumference now checked out at 2 ”, for a shrinkage of th of an inch.

(At 8:30 PM Jane and I tried psychological time, before the session which was due at 9 PM. Jane lay on the couch in the living room, I used the bed in the room next to my studio. It was very quiet and peaceful, and just about dark outside.

(I lay without concentrating upon anything in particular; I told myself I felt light and relaxed. Because I was using the word light for the first time in these experiments, [with a rather ill-defined idea of levitation in mind, after Jane’s attempts], I also told myself I was not afraid. I repeated these few words a few times, but do not believe I put myself in any kind of a trance, although at the time I took the precaution of reminding myself I could snap out of it any time I wanted to.

(For some time, trying to maintain a natural, pleasant waiting state, I had no results. Then an experience came. And again, while it had definite duration, it was still over with before I consciously understood what had taken place. This is just as I experienced the two visions of April 23, 1964, described on page 39.

(This time, I found myself standing in the doorway of an office building in New York City. I do not know what floor it was on, except that it was at least several floors up. It was not an office I had ever been in, yet was next door to an office I used to visit occasionally when Jane and I lived in Tenafly, NJ, and I was free-lancing as an artist in NYC. The building could be the Carnegie Hall office building, or one very close to Carnegie Hall, on 57th St. I do not recall the street number. The publisher I worked for occasionally was Charles Biro, the time was around 1955. I do not know whether he is still located there, or what has happened to him, not having seen him since.

(The entrance to Charles Biro’s offices was at the end of a hallway, as I remember, and the door to the anonymous office I visited tonight is next door to it. Tonight, I stood inside this open office door. To my left was a narrow window of vertical design, with either an aluminum or stainless steel frame. Looking out of this window, which was perhaps only two feet wide, I could see a shining aluminum or steel guardrail, and that even if a person managed to jump or fall out of this window, the safety of a stone parapet lay perhaps ten feet below. The time was daylight.

(At the window as I looked toward it, I saw a girl. She was trying to open the window, which I believe was designed to swing inward, perhaps in two sections, an upper half and a lower half.

(The girl’s back was to me. She had long black shining hair, was quite slim and shapely, and wore a sleeveless, yellow, silk-like blouse that seemed to flutter and glimmer with iridescent highlights, as though in a breeze. Looking back, I believe the upper half of the window was open; I seem to recall seeing the girl’s left arm draped over the top edge of the still-shut lower window.

(The girl was struggling to open the window. She never saw me, nor did I speak to her. I never thought of trying to.

(I then “came to” on the bed, sat up, and saw that it was 8:45 PM. While watching the girl, I had no sensation, or memory or awareness, of lying on the bed. I went into the living room to immediately describe the experience to Jane.)