“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

(Jane faced the painting as she sat in her Kennedy rocker, but my back was to it because of my position on the couch. During the several times I turned to look at it I noticed nothing out of the ordinary. Jane told me that Joseph, representing my own entity, smiled broadly at her in a way the painting actually doesn’t. The expression in the eyes changed first, the smile spreading from them down to the mouth. The forehead didn’t move. It was as though the painting became abruptly alive, although the painted head of Ruburt did not change.

(2. My effect concerns an interference in my vision, without an actual loss of sight. It produced no aftereffects this evening, nor had it ever in earlier years beyond a very slight headache. Tonight I didn’t get the headache. Strangely I’ve never been alarmed by this phenomenon. With my somewhat secretive nature I’d had no urge, even as a child, to tell my parents about it, or to see a doctor. The absence of aftereffects, and the continued clarity of my mental processes, may have been reassuring.

(Tonight’s experience wasn’t that intense. I first realized its onset at about 8:50, and at once began to give myself suggestions to minimize it because I didn’t want to alarm Jane by delaying the session. At the same time Jane began to describe the smile she perceived in the painting; I could see the painting well enough when she asked me to check it, although my vision effect was still building. My suggestions were very beneficial, though, and by session time at 9:05 I realized that not only had my experience gone as “far” as it was going to go, but also that it was on the retreat. By 9:15 the last traces of it were gone and my vision was clear.

(For the first time I conceded to myself that perhaps I ought to ask Seth to slow down, while realizing his pace was slow to begin with. I didn’t ask him what was happening. That worthy stared at me through Jane’s eyes without a sign that anything unusual might be taking place in the session….)

(With those words understanding came quickly, although the effects didn’t lift that easily. I made many errors talking to Jane, but the vocal difficulty never matched that of the spelling or writing. At first Jane was very concerned at my experiences before and during the session; she told me later that at this point she almost decided not to continue the session. She finally believed my reassurances, however, and realized that I was all right physically.

(Thus, I had experienced altered states of seeing, writing, spelling, and speaking this evening — all facets of course of my physical means of communication. Sitting in the glare of the brilliantly lit room, I described everything in detail to Jane, including the vision effects of earlier years. She wondered if my loss of communicative abilities was also related to my father’s senility and his own physical retreat. I didn’t know. I hadn’t experienced anything unusual involving him recently.