“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

It was a weekend that we had company. The friends present had no idea we were involved in any psychic work, and the subject never came up in our conversation. (No one knew what we were up to, for that matter, except for one close friend. We hadn’t even told our families.) In the middle of that innocuous evening, Rob suddenly had three experiences that were quite startling at the time and rather frightening. Here is an account from his own notes:

The first time, the sensation was not as strong as the next two times. When it first swept over me, I wondered if the wine could be responsible, though actually I had drunk little. I waited quietly, and in a moment or two the sensation was gone. I was balanced on the arm of our davenport, talking to our company. I had the odd feeling that the sensation was related both to the subject of conversation, and to some kind of message or communication I felt within me.

Later, after our company left, the sensation came back yet again as I stood in the kitchen talking to Jane. Even then, I was not quickwitted enough to capitalize on it, perhaps by asking myself questions. I was too involved in the feeling to be that objective on such short notice. Now, the next day, the memory still lingers. What was it? Maybe Seth will know.

She is always slightly dubious and doubtful before a session … since she is the one through whom I speak. The inner senses are not accustomed to operating so freely, and this sometimes upsets the all-present ego. Usually in our sessions, one inner sense is in strong operation. … Often, just beforehand Ruburt does not have a thought in his head … and then my ‘excellent’ dissertations begin, if you will forgive a touch of egoism on my part. He wants to know where the words are coming from and still wonders if I am a part of his subconscious; and I must admit that I find such an idea appalling. He wants his answers given to him in a way that his conscious mind can understand. This is our twenty-fourth session, and I am still trying to give you the answers.

The first time this happened, you were calling for help. Like many others, you feared the inner world so strongly, even though you were somewhat acquainted with it through your art, that nothing but panic would force you to try that invisible knob. This time, there was a remembrance of panic but that was all. Actually you opened the door out of desire, stimulated by our sessions and out of curiosity, but you were still frightened.

By now, the sessions were running from seventeen to twenty typed, double-spaced pages and they lasted anywhere from two and a half to three hours. Only one experiment using the tape recorder showed us that our usual procedure was the best one. Rob really had a great time, though, for the twenty-fifth session he didn’t have to take notes while we tried out the recorder. Seth also spoke much faster. He congratulated us on our “twenty-fifth anniversary,” and said jokingly, You will be much older by the time I am through with you. Most of the session was a discussion of ordinary subjective states emphasizing the fact that these could not be pinpointed in a laboratory or understood simply by the use of the ordinary scientific method. Yet, they are vital elements in our lives.

That weekend he didn’t feel well. Monday morning he tried self-hypnosis with good, though temporary, results. He felt better the rest of that day and on Tuesday. On Wednesday evening an upsetting incident happened, throwing our household and a neighbor’s into confusion, and aggravating Rob’s symptoms.

Our twenty-sixth session, due Monday, February 17, was not held for two reasons. This is the second time we have missed a session since they started in December. The first time we missed one was during the holidays. This time the reason was far different.

As the regular hour for our session came and went, Jane began to get ‘nibbles’ from Seth. At the same time, I felt worse. I had not been helping Jane and felt guilty about it and was angry at Miss C’s relatives. Once I had such a severe attack of back cramps that I couldn’t stand.