“Seth material” search engine (Jane Roberts)

A young adult gifted in a particular area may hold a belief that this ability makes him or her superior to all others. This may be quite beneficial for the person involved at a given time, to provide the needed impetus for development and the necessary independence in which the ability can grow. The same person, years older, may find that the identical belief has been held too long, so that it denies very important emotional give-and-take with contemporaries, or becomes restrictive in other ways.

If you believed you were unworthy because you were scrawny and bullied, then in some way you undoubtedly used that belief for your own purposes. Admit it. Discover what the purposes were. Perhaps you compensated — became athletic later, or used the impetus to go ahead in your own way. If your mother hated you, you may have used that to assert independence, to give you an excuse or a pathway; but in all cases you form your own reality, and so you agreed to it.